Nagging, in
interpersonal communication
Interpersonal communication is an exchange of information between two or more people. It is also an area of research that seeks to understand how humans use verbal and nonverbal cues to accomplish a number of personal and relational goals.
Inter ...
, is repetitious behaviour in the form of pestering, hectoring, harassing, or otherwise continuously urging an individual to complete previously discussed requests or act on advice. The word is derived from the Scandinavian ''nagga'', which means "to gnaw".
Reporter
Elizabeth Bernstein
Elizabeth Bernstein (born 10 October 1968) is an American sociologist who is noted for her studies that focus on women, gender, and sexuality. She is also a professor at Columbia University's Barnard College.
Education
Bernstein completed h ...
defined, in a ''
Wall Street Journal
''The Wall Street Journal'' is an American business-focused, international daily newspaper based in New York City, with international editions also available in Chinese and Japanese. The ''Journal'', along with its Asian editions, is published ...
'' article, nagging as "the interaction in which one person repeatedly makes a request, the other person repeatedly ignores it and both become increasingly annoyed".
Thus, nagging is a form of persistent
persuasion
Persuasion or persuasion arts is an umbrella term for Social influence, influence. Persuasion can influence a person's Belief, beliefs, Attitude (psychology), attitudes, Intention, intentions, Motivation, motivations, or Behavior, behaviours.
...
that is more repetitive than aggressive and it is an interaction to which each party contributes.
Nagging is a very common form of persuasion used in all aspects of life including domestic and professional. It is also a common practice in order to avoid more aggressive persuasive moves like threats.
Dynamics
Kari P. Soule Kari or KARI may refer to:
Places
*Kari, Jhunjhunu, a village in Rajasthan, India
* , a village in Mouhoun Province, Burkina Faso
*Kari, Tikamgarh, a town in Madhya Pradesh, India
* Kari, Iran, a village in Bushehr Province, Iran
* Kari-ye Bozorg ( ...
describes nagging as an "interpersonal ritual" but states that the term "seldom appears in interpersonal communication or conflict textbooks. It appears that 'nagging' is commonly used in everyday conversation but it rarely makes it to academic print".
Nagging as a form of interpersonal communication is considered to be a repetitious form of persuasion that can be employed as an alternative to resorting to more aggressive tactics in order to gain
compliance.
Martin Kozloff, Ph.D., Professor of Education at the
University of North Carolina at Wilmington
The University of North Carolina Wilmington (UNCW or UNC Wilmington) is a public research university in Wilmington, North Carolina. It is part of the University of North Carolina System and enrolls 17,499 undergraduate and graduate students eac ...
, identifies four main steps of nagging :
# The nagger gives the signal to perform or stop performing a task or behaviour.
# The person being nagged does not comply to the request from the nagger.
# In response, the nagger repeats his request or signal in a further effort to gain compliance.
# The person being nagged again responds with non-compliance.
Kozloff argues that this interaction cycle continues until either the one who is being nagged complies to the nagger's request or the nagger gives up the attempt to persuade. Kozloff identifies other important aspects of nagging; for instance, non-compliance is necessary for the persuader to be persistent. In addition, the persuader will often change the initial requests words and paralinguistic cues as a strategic tactic to entice the target into complying with the request.
Regarding compliance, behavioural noncompliance describes the situation that occurs when the person being nagged remains silent or agrees to complete the request, but later does not follow through. This strategy is employed to end the confrontation or interaction quickly without conflict, which is why it is common among spouses or partners. As the nagging interaction that starts out in a calm and polite manner continues and the persuader becomes more repetitive, the interaction is more likely to become aggressive in nature. Verbal noncompliance, on the other hand, describes the situation that occurs when the target tells the persuader through words that he will not comply, and is a more direct tactic than behavioural noncompliance. An example of verbal noncompliance could be a simple no, or I am too busy right now, or an even more elaborate response. This tactic does end the nagging interaction more rapidly; however, it can cause a more aggressive response from the persuader, who may escalate persistent persuasion into a threat or another aggressive form of persuasion.
Psychotherapists such as Edward S. Dean, M.D. have reported that individuals who nag are often "weak, insecure, and fearful ... their nagging disguises a basic feeling of weakness and provides an illusion of
power
Power most often refers to:
* Power (physics), meaning "rate of doing work"
** Engine power, the power put out by an engine
** Electric power
* Power (social and political), the ability to influence people or events
** Abusive power
Power may a ...
and superiority".
[ ] Nagging is sometimes used by spouses of alcoholics as one of several "drinking control efforts",
but it is often unproductive.
Psychologically, nagging can act to
reinforce
In behavioral psychology, reinforcement is a consequence applied that will strengthen an organism's future behavior whenever that behavior is preceded by a specific antecedent stimulus. This strengthening effect may be measured as a higher freq ...
behavior.
[ A study by the ]University of Florida
The University of Florida (Florida or UF) is a public land-grant research university in Gainesville, Florida. It is a senior member of the State University System of Florida, traces its origins to 1853, and has operated continuously on its ...
found the main factors that lead a person to nag are differences in "gender, social distance, and social status and power".
Gender
Kari P. Soule found an equal number of men and women nag; however, studies have shown that women are more likely to nag both men and women, while men are more likely to nag only men. Meaning women nag all people, which can be attributed to the reason why women are stereotyped as nagging people all the time.
Marital
Nagging by spouses is a common marital complaint. Nagging can be found between both male and female spouses. According to ''The Wall Street Journal
''The Wall Street Journal'' is an American business-focused, international daily newspaper based in New York City, with international editions also available in Chinese and Japanese. The ''Journal'', along with its Asian editions, is published ...
'', "It is possible for husbands to nag, and wives to resent them for nagging. But women are more likely to nag, experts say, largely because they are conditioned to feel more responsible for managing home and family life. And they tend to be more sensitive to early signs of problems in a relationship."
An 1897 article in ''Good Housekeeping
''Good Housekeeping'' is an American women's magazine featuring articles about women's interests, product testing by The Good Housekeeping Institute, recipes, diet, and health, as well as literary articles. It is well known for the "Good House ...
'' magazine stated that at that time, topics differed by gender; husbands' nagging usually involved finding "fault with their dinner, with the household bills ndwith the children", along with "carry nghome the worries of business.".
Parental and child
A study done at Washington State University
Washington State University (Washington State, WSU, or informally Wazzu) is a public land-grant research university with its flagship, and oldest, campus in Pullman, Washington. Founded in 1890, WSU is also one of the oldest land-grant unive ...
and published in 1959 described parental nagging of children as being a "symptom of the rejection of the child" in circumstances when children's requirements regarding "time and energy" are perceived to interfere with the mother's "individual needs and aspirations." According to James U. McNeal, there are seven classifications of juvenile nagging, wherein children nag their parents to obtain something they desire.
History
During the Middle Ages, a scold's bridle
A scold's bridle, sometimes called a witch's bridle, a gossip's bridle, a brank's bridle, or simply branks, was an instrument of punishment, as a form of public humiliation. It was an iron muzzle in an iron framework that enclosed the head ( ...
, also called a brank, was an instrument of punishment used primarily on women. The device was an iron muzzle in an iron framework that enclosed the head. A bridle
A bridle is a piece of equipment used to direct a horse. As defined in the ''Oxford English Dictionary'', the "bridle" includes both the that holds a bit that goes in the mouth of a horse, and the reins that are attached to the bit.
Headgear w ...
-bit (or curb-plate), about 2 inches long and 1 inch broad, projected into the mouth and pressed down on top of the tongue. The curb-plate was frequently studded with spikes, so that if the offender moved her tongue, it inflicted pain and made speaking impossible. Wives who were seen as witch
Witchcraft traditionally means the use of Magic (supernatural), magic or supernatural powers to harm others. A practitioner is a witch. In Middle Ages, medieval and early modern Europe, where the term originated, accused witches were usually ...
es, shrews
Shrews (family Soricidae) are small mole-like mammals classified in the order Eulipotyphla. True shrews are not to be confused with treeshrews, otter shrews, elephant shrews, West Indies shrews, or marsupial shrews, which belong to different ...
and scolds, were forced to wear the branks, locked onto their head.
See also
* Hypercriticism
* Monomania
In 19th-century psychiatry, monomania (from Greek , one, and , meaning "madness" or "frenzy") was a form of partial insanity conceived as single psychological obsession in an otherwise sound mind.
Types
Monomania may refer to:
* De Clerambaul ...
References
Further reading
*
Concerning Nagging Women
'
* {{cite book , title=Helping Children With Ill Or Disabled Parents: A Guide for Parents and Professionals , last1=Segal , first1=Julia , last2=Simkins , first2=John , year=1996 , publisher=Reader's Digest , pages=93–94 , url= https://books.google.com/books?id=Bl336y9vcE0C&q=%22nagging%22&pg=PA94 , access-date= December 20, 2010, isbn=9781853024092
Interpersonal relationships
Intimate relationships
Parenting