Kin-dza-dza!

''Kin-dza-dza!'' (russian: link=no, italics=yes, Кин-дза-дза!) is a 1986 Soviet film released by the Mosfilm studio and directed by Georgiy Daneliya, with a story by Georgiy Daneliya and Revaz Gabriadze.

Plot

The story begins in 1980s Moscow. Vladimir Mashkov, aka Uncle Vova, a generic but gruff construction foreman, is relaxing at home after a stressful day at work. His wife asks him to buy some groceries, so Vova goes out to the nearest store. Standing right in the city centre on Kalinin Prospekt (now New Arbat Avenue), is a barefoot man, dressed in a tattered coat, who appeals to passersby with a strange request: "Tell me the number of your planet in the Tentura? Or at least the number of your galaxy in the spiral?". Uncle Vova and a young Georgian student with a violin (The Violinist) stop and talk to the strange man. During a short conversation, the stranger shows them a teleportation device he calls a "traveler". Uncle Vova decides to test the veracity of the stranger's story, and despite the stranger's warnings, presses a random button on the device. Suddenly, Uncle Vova and the Violinist find themselves transported to the planet "Pluke" in the "Kin-dza-dza" galaxy.

The natives of the planet appear human, with deceptively primitive-looking technology and a barbaric culture, which satirically resembles that of humans. They are telepathic; the only spoken words normally used in their culture are "ku" (koo) and "kyu" (kyoo), the former stands for everything good, the latter being a swear word that stands for every bad thing. However, the Plukanians are able to quickly adapt to speaking and understanding Russian and Georgian. The society of Pluke is divided into two categories: "Chatlanians" and "Patsaks" ("пацак" is a backward spelling of "кацап", a derogatory term for Russians). The difference is ascertained only by means of a small handheld device, the "visator", similar in appearance to a flash drive; when pointed at a member of the Chatlanian group, an orange light on the device comes on; when pointed at a member of the Patsak group, a green light comes on. It is also noted that the social differences between Patsaks and Chatlanians are not constant: Pluke being a Chatlanian planet, Chatlanians are privileged, and a system of rituals must be followed by the Patsaks to show flattery; however, there are Patsak planets where Patsaks hold the upper hand and where Chatlanians are subservient. The "visator" shows that Uncle Vova and the Violinist are Patsaks.

The only group allowed to use weapons ("tranklucators") and enforce their will are the "ecilopps" ("police" spelled backwards). Outside being a Patsak or Chatlanin, respect towards others is determined by the color of their pants; different shades require those of lower social standing to "ku" at them a predetermined number of times, displaying their submission. The nominal leader of the Plukanian society is Mr. P-Zh; everybody makes their best to display fervent worship to him and disrespect is severely punished; however, when encountered in person, P-Zh appears harmless and dumb. The fuel of Pluke is called "luts" and is made from water. All naturally present water has apparently been processed into luts, so drinking water is a valuable commodity (in fact, it can only be made from luts).

A good deal of the plot is based on the fact that ordinary wooden matchsticks ("ketse") are considered to be extremely valuable on Pluke. Uncle Vova and the Violinist meet two locals, Uef and Bi, who at various points either help or abandon the Earthling duo in their quest to return to Earth, which at various times involves repairing Uef and Bi's ship or raiding P-Zh's private compound.

Uncle Vova and the Violinist finally encounter the man from the film's beginning, but he disappears, making it uncertain if he took them with him. The film then jumps back to the very beginning. As Uncle Vova heads outside, however, there is no man at the city center; furthermore, when he runs into the Violinist there, they do not recognize each other. Suddenly, a passing tractor with a flashing, orange light reminds them of the "ecilopps", and they both reflexively squat and say, "ku!", as it was required on Pluke. They immediately recognize each other. Uncle Vova, looking at the sky, hears the sound of a song performed by the Uef and Bi.

Cast (in order of appearance)

*Stanislav Lyubshin as Vladimir Nikolayevitch Mashkov ("Uncle Vova")
*Galina Daneliya-Yurkova as Lucya, Mashkov's wife
*Levan Gabriadze as Gedevan Alexandrovitch Alexidze ("Fiddler")
*Anatoli Serenko as the Barefoot Wanderer from Uzm
*Yury Yakovlev as Bi the Patsak, a wandering singer
*Yevgeny Leonov as Uef the Chatlanian, a wandering singer
* Igor Khan as the one-handed smuggler
*Alexander Litovkin as the gang leader
*Valentin Bukin as black-moustached ecilop in an egg-shaped pepelats, demonstrating how a tranklucator works
* Irina Shmelyova as Tsan, the cart driver (tachanka-driving woman, a wandering singer and dancer)
* Lev Perfilov as Kyrr, the dissident Chatlanian with a tranklucator
*Nina Ruslanova

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