Judith Martin (née Perlman; born September 13, 1938), better known by the

pen name A pen name, also called a ''nom de plume'' or a literary double, is a pseudonym (or, in some cases, a variant form of a real name) adopted by an author and printed on the title page or by-line of their works in place of their real name. A pen na ...

Miss Manners, is an American

columnist A columnist is a person who writes for publication in a series, creating an article that usually offers commentary and opinions. Columns appear in newspapers, magazines and other publications, including blogs. They take the form of a short ess ...

, author, and etiquette authority.

Early life and career

Martin is the daughter of Helen and Jacob Perlman. Her father was born in 1898 in

Białystok Białystok is the largest city in northeastern Poland and the capital of the Podlaskie Voivodeship. It is the tenth-largest city in Poland, second in terms of population density, and thirteenth in area. Białystok is located in the Białystok Up ...

, then part of the

Russian Empire The Russian Empire was an empire and the final period of the List of Russian monarchs, Russian monarchy from 1721 to 1917, ruling across large parts of Eurasia. It succeeded the Tsardom of Russia following the Treaty of Nystad, which ended th ...

, now in

Poland Poland, officially the Republic of Poland, , is a country in Central Europe. Poland is divided into Voivodeships of Poland, sixteen voivodeships and is the fifth most populous member state of the European Union (EU), with over 38 mill ...

. He immigrated to the United States in 1912. In 1925, he received his doctorate from the

University of Wisconsin A university () is an institution of higher (or tertiary) education and research which awards academic degrees in several academic disciplines. ''University'' is derived from the Latin phrase ''universitas magistrorum et scholarium'', which ...

, in economics. Jacob married Helen Aronson in 1935, and they moved to Washington, D.C., where Martin was born in 1938. Martin spent a significant part of her childhood in Washington, where she still lives and works, graduating from

Jackson-Reed High School , motto_translation = In days to come, it will please us to remember this , address = 3950 Chesapeake Street Northwest , region = Ward 3 , city = Washington, D.C. , zipcode ...

Class of 1955. She lived in various foreign capitals as a child, as her father, a

United Nations The United Nations (UN) is an intergovernmental organization whose stated purposes are to maintain international peace and security, develop friendly relations among nations, achieve international cooperation, and be a centre for harmonizi ...

economist An economist is a professional and practitioner in the social science discipline of economics. The individual may also study, develop, and apply theories and concepts from economics and write about economic policy. Within this field there are ...

, was frequently transferred. Martin graduated from

Wellesley College Wellesley College is a private women's liberal arts college in Wellesley, Massachusetts, United States. Founded in 1870 by Henry and Pauline Durant as a female seminary, it is a member of the original Seven Sisters Colleges, an unofficia ...

with a degree in English. Before she began the advice column, she was a journalist, covering social events at the

White House The White House is the official residence and workplace of the president of the United States. It is located at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue Northwest, Washington, D.C., NW in Washington, D.C., and has been the residence of every U.S. preside ...

and

embassies A diplomatic mission or foreign mission is a group of people from a state or organization present in another state to represent the sending state or organization officially in the receiving or host state. In practice, the phrase usually deno ...

; she then became a theater and film critic.

"Miss Manners"

In 1978, Martin began writing an advice column, which was distributed three and later six times a week by Universal Uclick and carried in more than 200 newspapers worldwide. In the column, she answers etiquette questions contributed by her readers and writes short essays on problems of manners, or clarifies the essential qualities of politeness. Martin writes about the ideas and intentions underpinning seemingly simple rules, providing a complex and advanced perspective, which she refers to as "heavy etiquette theory". Her columns have been collected in a number of books. In her writings, Martin refers to herself in the third person (e.g., "Miss Manners hopes..."). In a 1995 interview by Virginia Shea, Martin said:

You can deny all you want that there is etiquette, and a lot of people do in everyday life. But if you behave in a way that offends the people you're trying to deal with, they will stop dealing with you...There are plenty of people who say, "We don't care about etiquette, but we can't stand the way so-and-so behaves, and we don't want him around!" Etiquette doesn't have the great sanctions that the law has. But the main sanction we do have is in not dealing with these people and isolating them...

Martin identifies "blatant greed" as the most serious etiquette problem in the United States. The most frequently asked question she receives is how to politely demand cash from potential gift-givers (which she answers by stating that there is no polite way to do this), and the second most common question is how much potential guests must spend on a gift (determined by what the giver can afford, not by the event, relationship, related expenses or other factors). On August 29, 2013, Martin's children, Nicholas and Jacobina, began sharing credit for her columns.

Other

Martin was the recipient of a 2005 National Humanities Medal from President George W. Bush. On March 23, 2006, she was a special guest correspondent on '' The Colbert Report'', giving her analysis of the manners with which the White House Press Corps spoke to the President. Some of Martin's writings were collected and set to music by Dominick Argento in his

song cycle A song cycle (german: Liederkreis or Liederzyklus) is a group, or cycle, of individually complete songs designed to be performed in a sequence as a unit.Susan Youens, ''Grove online'' The songs are either for solo voice or an ensemble, or rarel ...

''Miss Manners on Music''. Since its launch in 2008, Judith Martin has been a contributor for wowOwow, a Web site for women to talk culture, politics, and gossip. Martin's uncle was

and labor historian Selig Perlman. Martin was portrayed by

Broadway theatre Broadway theatre,Although ''theater'' is generally the spelling for this common noun in the United States (see American and British English spelling differences), 130 of the 144 extant and extinct Broadway venues use (used) the spelling ''T ...

actress Jessie Mueller in '' The Post'',

Steven Spielberg Steven Allan Spielberg (; born December 18, 1946) is an American director, writer, and producer. A major figure of the New Hollywood era and pioneer of the modern blockbuster, he is the most commercially successful director of all time. Spi ...

's 2017 movie about the

Pentagon Papers The ''Pentagon Papers'', officially titled ''Report of the Office of the Secretary of Defense Vietnam Task Force'', is a United States Department of Defense history of the United States in the Vietnam War, United States' political and military ...

Books

* ''The Name on the White House Floor'' * ''Gilbert'' (This was subtitled "A Comedy Of Manners," and was a work of fiction.) * ''Style and Substance'' * ''Miss Manners' Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior'' * ''Miss Manners Rescues Civilization: From Sexual Harassment, Frivolous Lawsuits, Dissing and Other Lapses in Civility'' * ''Miss Manners on Weddings'' * ''Miss Manners' Guide to a Surprisingly Dignified Wedding'' with Jacobina Martin * ''Miss Manners on Painfully Proper Weddings'' * ''Common Courtesy: In Which Miss Manners Solves the Problem That Baffled Mr. Jefferson'' * ''Miss Manners' Guide for the Turn-of-the-Millennium'' * ''Miss Manners' Basic Training: Communication'' * ''Miss Manners' Basic Training: The Right Thing To Say'' * ''Miss Manners' Basic Training: Eating'' * ''Miss Manners' Guide to Rearing Perfect Children''Briefly reviewed in ''

The New Yorker ''The New Yorker'' is an American weekly magazine featuring journalism, commentary, criticism, essays, fiction, satire, cartoons, and poetry. Founded as a weekly in 1925, the magazine is published 47 times annually, with five of these issue ...

'' (14 January 1985) : 119. * ''Star-Spangled Manners'' * ''Miss Manners' Guide to Domestic Tranquility: The Authoritative Manual for Every Civilized Household, However Harried'' * ''Miss Manners: A Citizen's Guide to Civility'' * ''No Vulgar Hotel: The Desire and Pursuit of Venice'' * ''Miss Manners Minds Your Business'' with Nicholas Ivor Martin * ''Miss Manners' Guide to Contagious Etiquette'' with Nicholas Martin and Jacobina Martin

References

External links