The split attraction model (SAM) is a model in
psychology
Psychology is the scientific study of mind and behavior. Its subject matter includes the behavior of humans and nonhumans, both consciousness, conscious and Unconscious mind, unconscious phenomena, and mental processes such as thoughts, feel ...
that distinguishes between a person's
romantic and
sexual attraction, allowing the two to be different from each other.
History and identity
The first recorded conceptualization of orientation that took into account split attraction was in 1879 by
Karl Heinrich Ulrichs
Karl Heinrich Ulrichs (28 August 1825 – 14 July 1895) was a German lawyer, jurist, journalist, and writer. He is today regarded as a pioneer of sexology and the modern LGBT rights movement, gay rights movement. Ulrichs has been described as ...
, a German writer who published 12 books on
non-heterosexual
Non-heterosexual is a word for a sexual orientation or sexual identity that is not heterosexual. The term helps define the "concept of what is the norm and how a particular group is different from that norm". ''Non-heterosexual'' is used in fe ...
attraction. In these books, Ulrichs has presented several classifications that are quite similar to modern
LGBTQIA+ identities. Among his works, he described people who are "''konjunktiver
Uranodioning''" and "''disjunktiver Uranodioning''" or conjunctive bisexuality and disjunctive bisexuality. The former is described as having tender and
passionate
Passion (Greek ''πάσχω'' "to suffer, to be acted on" and Late Latin (chiefly Christian) ''passio'' "passion; suffering") denotes strong and intractable or barely controllable emotion or inclination with respect to a particular person or ...
feelings for both men and women, which would be a biromantic bisexual in modern times. The second is one who has tender feelings for people of the same gender/sex, but 'in love' feelings for people of a different gender/sex, which would now be a heteroromantic homosexual. However, the Ulrichs model never became popular due to its complexity.
A newer example of the separation of sexual and romantic attractions was in 1979 by
psychologist
A psychologist is a professional who practices psychology and studies mental states, perceptual, cognitive, emotional, and social processes and behavior. Their work often involves the experimentation, observation, and explanation, interpretatio ...
Dorothy Tennov
Dorothy Jane Tennow (August 29, 1928 – February 3, 2007), known as Dorothy Tennov, was an American psychologist who, in her 1979 book, ''Love and Limerence – the Experience of Being in Love'', introduced the term "limerence".
Early life and ...
, with the publication of her book ''Love and Limerence – the Experience of Being in Love''. In the book, Tennov described
limerence
Limerence is the mental state of being madly in love or intensely infatuated when reciprocation of the feeling is uncertain. This state is characterized by intrusive thoughts and idealization of the loved one (also called "crystallization"), ...
as a form of attraction that could be described as a
crush
Crush may refer to:
* Infatuation or limerence, the romantic attraction to another person
* Puppy love, feelings of love, romance, or infatuation felt by young people
Crush may also refer to:
Film
* Crush (1972 film), ''Crush'' (1972 film), a H ...
on someone. Although Tennov saw sex as part of limerence, she recognized that it was not its main focus. The term "non-limerent" is sometimes considered the precursor of aromantic.
The modern concept of the ''split attraction model'' was coined by the
asexual and
aromantic
Aromanticism is a romantic orientation characterized by experiencing little to no romantic attraction. The term "aromantic", Colloquialism, colloquially shortened to "aro", refers to a person whose romantic orientation is aromanticism.
It is d ...
communities to better describe their identities within the community and to others. The term likely emerged around 2015, though the concept of split attractions had been in use since the origination of the term aromantic in 2005. The model helps people explain how they can still experience certain aspects of one attraction without the need for the other to be a match. A recent research study looked deeper into the relationships of asexuals to help explain how people still form meaningful connections, despite deviance of societal norms.
Relationships formed by people that identify under the split attraction model are often considered outside the norm and may include forms of committed
friendship
Friendship is a Interpersonal relationship, relationship of mutual affection between people. It is a stronger form of interpersonal bond than an "acquaintance" or an "association", such as a classmate, neighbor, coworker, or colleague.
Althoug ...
s or intimate non-romantic relationships such as
queerplatonic relationships.
In a practical application of the model, people of the community commonly refer to themselves by two terms to indicate the differing romantic and sexual attraction; examples include ''aromantic asexual'', colloquially shortened , ''panromantic demisexual'' or ''aromantic bisexual''.
Specific terms exist, such as ''varioriented'' and ''perioriented'', describing those with different or similar orientations, respectively. For example, a homoromantic bisexual would be varioriented, while a heteroromantic heterosexual would be labeled as perioriented.
The concept and term are most commonly used within the
LGBTQIA+ community, but more recent research found that it may also apply to people outside of the community that are just not yet familiar with the concept.
Research

The concept that there is a distinction between
romantic orientation
Romantic orientation, also called affectional orientation, is the classification of the sex or gender which a person experiences romantic attraction towards or is likely to have a romantic relationship with. The term is used alongside the t ...
and
sexual orientation
Sexual orientation is an enduring personal pattern of romantic attraction or sexual attraction (or a combination of these) to persons of the opposite sex or gender, the same sex or gender, or to both sexes or more than one gender. Patterns ar ...
has not been studied extensively.
American psychologist
Lisa M. Diamond, who focuses her studies on sexual orientation and identity, has stated that a person's romantic orientation can differ from whom the person is sexually attracted to.
While there is limited research on the discordance between sexual attraction and romantic attraction in individuals, the possibility of
fluidity and diversity in attractions have been progressively recognized.
In a 2022 book edited by psychologists Angela M. Schubert and
Mark Pope
Mark Edward Pope (born September 11, 1972) is an American collegiate basketball coach and former player who is head men's basketball coach at the University of Kentucky, his alma matter.
As a player, Pope played power forward and small forward ...
, authors Stacey Litam and Megan Speciale refer to an article by
Michael Paramo published in ''
Aze'' that identifies other forms of attraction beyond sexual and romantic attraction, including aesthetic, emotional, intellectual, and sensual attraction, to argue that these forms of attraction should also be considered in interpersonal relationships.
Paramo argued in a 2024 book that splitting attraction can influence people to re-imagine their relationships differently when forms of attraction are not placed in a hierarchy.
A 2022 study found that while there is some concordance between romantic orientation and sexual orientation, the two were not a complete match, suggesting that the experience of split attraction between romantic and sexual orientation exists in both asexual and non-asexual people.
A 2023 study noted that there is a general misunderstanding that different forms of attraction can exist concurrently both within and external to the LGBTQ community.
See also
*
Aromanticism
Aromanticism is a romantic orientation characterized by experiencing little to no romantic attraction. The term "aromantic", colloquially shortened to "aro", refers to a person whose romantic orientation is aromanticism.
It is distinct from, ...
*
Asexuality
Asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction to others, or low or absent interest in or Sexual desire, desire for Human sexual activity, sexual activity. It may be considered a sexual orientation or the lack thereof. It may also be categori ...
*
Queerplatonic relationship
*
Romantic orientation
Romantic orientation, also called affectional orientation, is the classification of the sex or gender which a person experiences romantic attraction towards or is likely to have a romantic relationship with. The term is used alongside the t ...
*
Sexual orientation
Sexual orientation is an enduring personal pattern of romantic attraction or sexual attraction (or a combination of these) to persons of the opposite sex or gender, the same sex or gender, or to both sexes or more than one gender. Patterns ar ...
References
Further reading
Splitting Attraction: A History of Discussing Orientationby ''
Aromantic-spectrum Union for Recognition, Education, and Advocacy (AUREA)''
{{Sex
Aromanticism
Asexuality
Romantic orientation
LGBTQ
Sexual identity models