''Percy's Progress'' (US title: ''It's Not the Size That Counts'') is a 1974 British

comedy film The comedy film is a film genre that emphasizes humor. These films are designed to amuse audiences and make them laugh. Films in this genre typically have a happy ending, with dark comedy being an exception to this rule. Comedy is one of the o ...

directed by

Ralph Thomas Ralph Philip Thomas (10 August 1915 – 17 March 2001) was an English film director who directed the Doctor (film series), ''Doctor'' film series. Thomas cast the actor James Robertson Justice in many of his films. He often worked with the pr ...

and starring

Leigh Lawson Allan Leigh Lawson (born 21 July 1945) is an English actor, director and writer. Early life Lawson was born in Atherstone, Warwickshire. He initially studied at Mountview Academy of Theatre Arts before training further at the Royal Academy of ...

Elke Sommer Elke Sommer (; née Schletz, 5 November 1940) is a German actress. She appeared in numerous films throughout the 1960s and 1970s, including roles in ''The Pink Panther'' sequel '' A Shot in the Dark'' (1964), the Bob Hope comedy '' Boy, Did I ...

Denholm Elliott Denholm Mitchell Elliott (31 May 1922 – 6 October 1992) was an English actor. He appeared in numerous productions on stage and screen, receiving BAFTA awards for Best Actor in a Supporting Role for ''Trading Places'' (1983), '' A Private Fu ...

Judy Geeson Judith Amanda Geeson ( ; born 10 September 1948) is an English film, stage, and television actress. She began her career primarily working on British television series, with a leading role on '' The Newcomers'' from 1965 to 1967, before making ...

and

Harry H. Corbett Harry H. Corbett (28 February 1925 – 21 March 1982) was an English actor. He is best remembered for playing rag-and-bone man Harold Steptoe alongside Wilfrid Brambell in the long-running BBC Television sitcom '' Steptoe and Son'' (1962–196 ...

. It was written by

Sid Colin Sid Colin (born Sidney Coblentz; 31 August 1915 – 12 December 1989) was an English scriptwriter, working for radio, television and the cinema. He is best remembered for creating the television comedy ''The Army Game'' (1957–1959) and writing ...

and

Ian La Frenais Ian La Frenais (born 7 January 1937) is a retired English writer best known for his creative partnership with Dick Clement. They are most famous for television series including '' The Likely Lads'', ''Whatever Happened to the Likely Lads?'', ' ...

. The film is a sequel to '' Percy'' (1971). It was the last film from producer Betty Box.

's character was closely modelled on British prime minister

Harold Wilson James Harold Wilson, Baron Wilson of Rievaulx (11 March 1916 – 23 May 1995) was a British statesman and Labour Party (UK), Labour Party politician who twice served as Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, from 1964 to 1970 and again from 197 ...

, down to using well-known Wilson phrases such as "thirteen years of Tory misrule" and speaking with a distinct

Yorkshire Yorkshire ( ) is an area of Northern England which was History of Yorkshire, historically a county. Despite no longer being used for administration, Yorkshire retains a strong regional identity. The county was named after its county town, the ...

accent.

Plot

Percy is known in England as the man who had the world's first penis transplant, and is exceptionally well endowed. His rampant conquests of married women cause him to flee, to escape incarceration. A chemical, PX123, is accidentally released into the world's water supply rendering all men impotent. Percy is unaware that he is the only man on earth who can achieve an erection because he was in hiding from the law at sea, drinking nothing but champagne. When Percy goes ashore to relieve his year-long sexual tension at a brothel, he gains the attention of the British press and subsequently the British government, who then want to use him to repopulate the world. An international pageant is held to find each country's "Miss Conception" representative. At the same time, a team of doctors work to find an antidote to the effects of PX123.

Cast

as Percy Edward Anthony *

as Clarissa *

as Sir Emmanuel Whitbread *

as Dr. Fairweather *

as Prime Minister *

Vincent Price Vincent Leonard Price Jr. (May 27, 1911 – October 25, 1993) was an American actor. He was known for his work in the horror film genre, mostly portraying villains. He appeared on stage, television, and radio, and in more than 100 films. Price ...

as Stavos Mammonian *

Adrienne Posta Adrienne Posta (born Adrienne Luanne Poster) is a British actress and singer, prominent during the 1960s and 1970s. She adopted the surname 'Posta' in 1966.Adrienne Poster, page on "Ready Steady Girls" (readysteadygirls.eu). Retrieved 19 Novembe ...

as PC 217 (Iris) *

Julie Ege Julie Ege (; 12 November 1943 – 29 April 2008) was a Norwegian actress, model and beauty pageant titleholder. She appeared in many British films of the 1960s and 1970s. Early life Ege was born in Sandnes, the daughter of brickyard worker ...

as Miss Hanson *

Barry Humphries John Barry Humphries (17 February 1934 – 22 April 2023) was an Australian comedian, actor, author and satirist. He was best known for writing and playing his stage and television characters Dame Edna Everage and Sir Les Patterson. He appeare ...

as Dr. Anderson/Australian TV lady *

James Booth James Booth (born David Noel Geeves; 19 December 1927 – 11 August 2005) was an English film, stage and television actor and screenwriter. He is best known for his role as Private Henry Hook in '' Zulu.'' ''Variety'' called him "a punchy b ...

as Jeffcot *

Milo O'Shea Milo Donal O'Shea (2 June 1926 – 2 April 2013) was an Irish actor. He was twice nominated for the Tony Award for Best Actor in a Play for his performances in ''Staircase'' (1968) and '' Mass Appeal'' (1982). Early life O'Shea was born and ...

as Dr. Klein * Ronald Fraser as Bleeker *

Anthony Andrews Anthony Colin Gerald Andrews (born 12 January 1948) is an English actor. He played Lord Sebastian Flyte in the ITV miniseries ''Brideshead Revisited'' (1981), for which he won Golden Globe and BAFTA television awards, and was nominated for ...

as Catchpole *

Bernard Lee John Bernard Lee (10 January 190816 January 1981) was an English actor, best known for his role as M in the first eleven Eon-produced James Bond films. Lee's film career spanned the years 1934 to 1979, though he had appeared on stage from ...

as Barraclough *

Madeline Smith Madeline Smith (born 2 August 1949) is an English actress. After working as a model in the late 1960s, she went on to appear in many television series and stage productions, as well as comedy and horror films, in the 1970s and 1980s. Smith pla ...

as Miss UK *

Judy Matheson Judy Matheson (born 27 August 1945) is a British actress notable for her appearances in several horror films in the 1970s. She also appeared in many other films and television series. Career After drama school, Matheson began her career in 19 ...

as Maria *

Alan Lake Alan Lake (24 November 1940 – 10 October 1984) was an English actor and the third and final husband of screen star Diana Dors. Biography Alan Lake was born in Stoke-on-Trent, Staffordshire on 24 November 1940.Donnelley, Paul (2003) ''Fad ...

as Derry Hogan *

George Coulouris George Alexander Coulouris (1 October 1903 – 25 April 1989) was an English film and stage actor. He was perhaps best known for his collaborations with Orson Welles, most notably ''Citizen Kane''. Early life Of Anglo-Greek origin, Coulouris ...

as Professor Godowski *

Jenny Hanley Jenny Hanley (born 15 August 1947) is an English actress and presenter. She was one of the presenters of the ITV children's magazine programme ''Magpie''. She currently presents a show on Boom Radio. Early life and education Hanley is the dau ...

as Miss Teenage Lust *

Carol Hawkins Carol Hawkins (born 31 January 1949) is an English actress, best known for her various comic roles in numerous television sitcoms and films in the 1970s and 1980s. She played the roles of Sharon Eversleigh in the film of the television series ...

as Maggie * T. P. McKenna as news editor *

Anthony Sharp Dennis Anthony John Sharp (16 June 1915 – 23 July 1984) was an English actor, writer and director. Stage career Anthony Sharp was a graduate of the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Art ( LAMDA) and made his stage debut in February 1938 ...

as judge *

Alan Tilvern Alan Tilvern (5 November 1918 – 17 December 2003) was an English actor. He was known for usually playing "tough-guy" roles. Life Tilvern was born 5 November 1918 in Whitechapel, in the East End of London, to Lithuanian-Jewish parents, who ...

as General Dodds *

Minah Bird Minah Ogbenyealu Bird (also known as Mynah Bird and Minah Uko) (11 March 1950 – July 1995) was a Nigerian model and actress active in the United Kingdom in the 1970s. Early life Bird was born in from Aba in Nigeria and was educated in ...

as Miss America * Luis De Jesus as the dwarf (in additional American release footage)

Production

Betty Box says in her autobiography that they only agreed with

Nat Cohen Nat Cohen (23 December 1905 – 10 February 1988)William D. Rubinstein, et al (eds.''The Palgrave Dictionary of Anglo-Jewish History'' Palgrave Macmillan, 2011, p.171 was a British film producer and executive. For over four decades he was one of t ...

to make a sequel to '' Percy'' (1971) if he financed a film about

Byron George Gordon Byron, 6th Baron Byron (22 January 1788 – 19 April 1824) was an English poet. He is one of the major figures of the Romantic movement, and is regarded as being among the greatest poets of the United Kingdom. Among his best-kno ...

and Shelley, to be called ''The Reckless Years''. However, Cohen reneged on the deal once ''Percy's Progress'' was made. The film was based on an idea by Sid Collin. The lead role went to Leigh Lawson who Ralph Thomas called "the best young actor around who hasn't already established himself. We saw dozens of good-looking, virilie young actors but we decided that Leigh had the look that we liked." Filming started in January 1974 and took place at Elstree Studios and on the island of Cyprus. "We're not out for cheap laughs," said Thomas. "Just loud ones."

Release

The US version of the film includes several additional scenes shot by the American distributor, which include an opening scene of a penis transplant operation, and a scene in which a dwarf, played by Luis De Jesus, the star of '' Blood Sucking Freaks'' (1976), is seen jumping out of a woman's bed, leaving her to say the film's American title, "It's not the size that counts."

Critical reception

''The Daily Mirror'' said "the laughter is still all too frequently of the nervous variety" but said there were "some genuinely funny moments" and "remarkably funny performances." The ''Daily Telegraph'' criticised the "ponderous direction" and the "yawningly repetitive and emphatic script". ''

The Monthly Film Bulletin The ''Monthly Film Bulletin'' was a periodical of the British Film Institute published monthly from February 1934 until April 1991, when it merged with '' Sight & Sound''. It reviewed all films on release in the United Kingdom, including those wi ...

'' wrote:

It's now three years since Ralph Thomas and Betty Box made their first leeringly coy foray into sex comedy; this sequel to Percy finds them maintaining the same approach, with the same jejune results. Their chosen tactic is to beat around the bush (a joke which, oddly, no-one uses): the movie's main protagonist is kept securely locked behind trousers or below the frame-line, and words of four letters rarely have more than their first one uttered. The sexual innuendo on which music halls and
Donald McGill Donald Fraser Gould McGill (28 January 1875 – 13 October 1962) was an English graphic artist whose name has become synonymous with the genre of saucy postcards, particularly associated with the seaside (though they were sold throughout the U ...
thrived for years has lost its gusto; afficionados will find in ''Percy's Progress'' no more than a string of impotent jokes about impotence. In some ways, Sid Colin and Ian La Frenais seem aware of this, for they keep drifting into other areas for material – showbiz, TV, ethnic characteristics, and spy movies all have their fair share of parody. The comic focus is further blurred by every scene being decked out with familiar British faces. Some come out of the charades with a shred more dignity than others: James Booth's shambling, Harlesden-based private eye, Harry H. Corbett's silver-haired, H.P. Sauce-loving Prime Minister, Barry Humphries' implacable
Edna Everage Dame Edna Everage, often known simply as Dame Edna, is a character created and portrayed by Australian comedian Barry Humphries, known for her lilac-coloured ("wisteria hue") hair and cat eye glasses ("face furniture"); her favourite flower, ...
. Matters aren't improved by the misguided attempt to brighten the movie up with modish fripperies: the soundtrack is chock-a-block with unwanted songs, and the editor treats us to the full range of fancy wipes in the shapes of circles, squares, stars, and even pieces from a jigsaw puzzle. There is no such wantonness in the direction, however; Ralph Thomas' handling is as intensely routine as one has come to expect.

Alexander Walker wrote in his ''

Evening Standard The ''London Standard'', formerly the ''Evening Standard'' (1904–2024) and originally ''The Standard'' (1827–1904), is a long-established regional newspaper published weekly and distributed free newspaper, free of charge in London, Engl ...

'' column in 1974 that the film is "just about the deepest depth ever plumbed by the once considerable and now nearly contemptible British film industry in its resolute search for the lowest kind of taste among the thickest kind of people."

References

External links

* {{Ralph Thomas 1974 films 1970s sex comedy films British comedy films British sex comedy films Films shot at EMI-Elstree Studios Films directed by Ralph Thomas British sequel films Films produced by Betty Box Films with screenplays by Ian La Frenais 1974 comedy films Films with screenplays by Sid Colin 1970s English-language films 1970s British films English-language sex comedy films