"Have Some Madeira M'Dear", also titled "Madeira, M'Dear?", is a
darkly comic song by
Flanders and Swann.
The lyrics tell of an elderly
rake who "slyly inveigles" an attractive girl of 17 to his flat to view his collection of
stamps, where he offers her a glass of
Madeira
Madeira ( ; ), officially the Autonomous Region of Madeira (), is an autonomous Regions of Portugal, autonomous region of Portugal. It is an archipelago situated in the North Atlantic Ocean, in the region of Macaronesia, just under north of ...
, a fortified Portuguese wine. The girl enthusiastically drains her glass, becoming slightly drunk in the process. Sensing victory, he offers her another glass, which she accepts. However, before raising it to her lips, she recalls her dying mother's warning to avoid red wine. With a cry, the girl drops the glass and flees the apartment, the old roué's pleas for her to remain echoing in her ears. The following morning, however, she wakes in bed with a hangover and a beard tickling her ear.
The song contains three much-quoted instances of
zeugma:
* And he said as he hastened to put out the cat, the wine, his cigar and the lamps
* She lowered her standards by raising her glass, her courage, her eyes and his hopes
* She made no reply, up her mind and a dash for the door.
[Flanders and Swann, pp. 143–145]
The lyrics were recited as a poem by
Tony Randall in episode #922 of ''
The Carol Burnett Show
''The Carol Burnett Show'' is an American variety/sketch comedy television show that originally ran on CBS from September 11, 1967, to March 29, 1978, for 279 episodes, and again with nine episodes in fall 1991. It starred Carol Burnett, Harv ...
'' which first aired February 21, 1976.
Notes and references
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;References
Sources
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{{Authority control
Flanders and Swann songs
Black comedy music
1956 songs
Songs about alcohol