''The Calcium Kid'' is a British

mockumentary A mockumentary (a blend of ''mock'' and ''documentary''), fake documentary or docu-comedy is a type of film or television show depicting fictional events but presented as a documentary. These productions are often used to analyze or comment on c ...

comedy film which was released in 2004. It stars

Orlando Bloom Orlando Jonathan Blanchard Copeland Bloom (born 13 January 1977) is an English actor. He made his breakthrough as the character Legolas in ''The Lord of the Rings'' film series ''The Fellowship of the Ring'' (2001), ''The Two Towers'' (2002), a ...

as a milkman and amateur boxer.

Billie Piper Billie Paul Piper (born Leian Paul Piper; 22 September 1982) is an English actress and former singer. She initially gained recognition as a singer after releasing her debut single "Because We Want To" at age 15, which made her the youngest woman ...

and

Michael Peña Michael Anthony Peña (; ; born January 13, 1976) is an American actor. He has starred in many films, including ''Crash'' (2004), '' World Trade Center'' (2006), '' Shooter'' (2007), '' Observe and Report'' (2009), '' Tower Heist'' (2011), '' Batt ...

are also featured. It is directed by Alex De Rakoff and produced by

Working Title Films Working Title Films is a British film studio that produces motion pictures and television programs and is a subsidiary of Universal Pictures, a division of NBCUniversal, which is itself a division of Comcast. The company was founded by Tim Bev ...

Plot

Jimmy Connelly is a milkman who is thrust into the spotlight after a brutal fighter, Pete Wright, gets injured. Under manager Herbie Bush, Jimmy must fight the middleweight champion of the world, Jose Mendez. Within the lead up to the fight with Mendez, Jimmy has to take part in a press conference, in which Bush recommends him to give Mendez fighting talk. However, this leads to Jimmy being seen as a

fascist Fascism is a far-right, Authoritarianism, authoritarian, ultranationalism, ultra-nationalist political Political ideology, ideology and Political movement, movement,: "extreme militaristic nationalism, contempt for electoral democracy and pol ...

and a disgrace to England after being seen as racist. After Jimmy realises the harm Bush has caused, he calls off the fight. As Bush and the training team look for Jimmy, they find him cleaning his old milk cart. In a negotiation to help the town in order to fight, Jimmy is persuaded to participate. In the locker room, minutes before the fight, as Jimmy and his crew walk backstage, Wright holds a shotgun to them, whilst the camera crew is also held hostage, filming the event. Wright leads them to a room where Jimmy is forced to fight Mendez, who is also held hostage. After getting substantially battered by Mendez, Jimmy manages to fight back, but then Wright smacks his head with the gun. As Wright goes to shoot Mendez, who is praying for his life, Jimmy knocks out Wright with a single punch. With the film crew recording the event, Jimmy becomes a hero across Britain.

Cast

Reception

The film received negative reviews from critics. On

Rotten Tomatoes Rotten Tomatoes is an American review-aggregation website for film and television. The company was launched in August 1998 by three undergraduate students at the University of California, Berkeley: Senh Duong, Patrick Y. Lee, and Stephen Wang ...

it has a rare overall rating of 0% based on reviews from 5 critics, with an average rating of 3.9/10.

Peter Bradshaw Peter Bradshaw (born 19 June 1962) is a British writer and film critic. He has been chief film critic at ''The Guardian'' since 1999, and is a contributing editor at ''Esquire''. Early life and education Bradshaw was educated at Haberdashers ...

the Guardian ''The Guardian'' is a British daily newspaper. It was founded in 1821 as ''The Manchester Guardian'', and changed its name in 1959. Along with its sister papers ''The Observer'' and ''The Guardian Weekly'', ''The Guardian'' is part of the Gu ...

gave it 1 out of 5, mentions that the due to success of

The Lord of the Rings ''The Lord of the Rings'' is an epic high-fantasy novel by English author and scholar J. R. R. Tolkien. Set in Middle-earth, intended to be Earth at some time in the distant past, the story began as a sequel to Tolkien's 1937 children's boo ...

, Orlando Bloom "puts a lot of youthful buttocks on seats, and that demographic calculation can be the only reason for releasing this shamingly bad British comedy."

Variety Variety may refer to: Arts and entertainment Entertainment formats * Variety (radio) * Variety show, in theater and television Films * ''Variety'' (1925 film), a German silent film directed by Ewald Andre Dupont * ''Variety'' (1935 film), ...

said Bloom was "likable enough, but it's not a strong enough performance to anchor a one-joke movie" and praised the supporting actors, but was critical of the obviously scripted mockumentary for "the sheer unbelievability of the basic premise" and the "lack of sufficient invention in the script" saying it pales in comparison to soccer mockumentary, " Mike Bassett, England Manager".

Empire An empire is a "political unit" made up of several territories and peoples, "usually created by conquest, and divided between a dominant center and subordinate peripheries". The center of the empire (sometimes referred to as the metropole) ex ...

gave it 2 out of 5, and said "none of the integral elements of the film - script, acting or direction - gel quite as well as they might, and what's left is an over-stylised advert for milk."

References

External links

* * {{DEFAULTSORT:Calcium Kid, The 2004 films British sports comedy films Working Title Films films StudioCanal films Universal Pictures films British boxing films 2000s sports comedy films Fictional boxers Fictional milkmen Films produced by Eric Fellner 2004 comedy films 2000s English-language films 2000s British films