''P'tang, Yang, Kipperbang'', also released as ''Kipperbang'', is a British television film first shown on

Channel 4 Channel 4 is a British free-to-air public broadcast television network operated by the state-owned Channel Four Television Corporation. It began its transmission on 2 November 1982 and was established to provide a fourth television service ...

on its second night, 3 November 1982. Written by

Jack Rosenthal Jack Morris Rosenthal (8 September 1931 – 29 May 2004) was an English playwright. He wrote 129 early episodes of the ITV soap opera ''Coronation Street'' and over 150 screenplays, including original TV plays, feature films, and adaptations. ...

as part of the ''First Love'' series, it is a coming-of-age film set in a

grammar school A grammar school is one of several different types of school in the history of education in the United Kingdom and other English-speaking countries, originally a school teaching Latin, but more recently an academically oriented secondary school ...

in the outer

London London is the capital and List of urban areas in the United Kingdom, largest city of England and the United Kingdom, with a population of just under 9 million. It stands on the River Thames in south-east England at the head of a estuary dow ...

suburbs of the late forties (1948). The film was directed by

Michael Apted Michael David Apted, (10 February 1941 – 7 January 2021) was a British television and film director and producer. Apted began working in television and directed the '' Up'' documentary series (1964–2019). He later directed '' Coal Miner's ...

, known for the UK TV documentary series ''

7 Up 7 Up (stylized as 7up outside North America) is an American brand of lemon-lime-flavored non-caffeinated soft drink. The brand and formula are owned by Keurig Dr Pepper although the beverage is internationally distributed by PepsiCo. 7 Up co ...

''. It is the story of Alan Duckworth (John Albasiny), a young

cricket Cricket is a bat-and-ball game played between two teams of eleven players on a field at the centre of which is a pitch with a wicket at each end, each comprising two bails balanced on three stumps. The batting side scores runs by str ...

-obsessed boy, and his first kiss with Ann Lawton (

Abigail Cruttenden Abigail Lucy Cruttenden (born 23 March 1968) is an English actress. Cruttenden played opposite Sean Bean as his character Richard Sharpe's wife Jane in several episodes of the TV series '' Sharpe.'' In 2007, Cruttenden joined the cast from the ...

). Alan's thoughts are voiced by real life

BBC Radio BBC Radio is an operational business division and service of the British Broadcasting Corporation (which has operated in the United Kingdom under the terms of a royal charter since 1927). The service provides national radio stations covering ...

cricket commentator __NOTOC_is a list of notable media commentators and writers on the sport of cricket from around the world. A number of famous players have had a second career as writers or commentators. However, many commentators never played the game at a prof ...

John Arlott Leslie Thomas John Arlott, OBE (25 February 1914 – 14 December 1991) was an English journalist, author and cricket commentator for the BBC's ''Test Match Special''. He was also a poet and wine connoisseur. With his poetic phraseology, he be ...

in the style of a match commentary. The title phrase comes from a password used by members of Alan's gang.

Plot

Alan Duckworth (known as 'Quack Quack' to his friends) is a socially awkward fourteen-year-old who is obsessed with cricket and Ann Lawton, a girl in his class. Alan daydreams throughout his day (often with a voiceover by cricket commentator

), showing up late for school and making little academic progress. He is friendly with the groundsman Tommy (

Garry Cooper Garry Cooper is an English actor. He was born in Hull, East Yorkshire, on 2 June 1955. Garry trained at Drama Centre, London and has worked extensively in film, television and theatre. Filmography External links * {{DEFAULTSORT:Coope ...

), whom he views as a hero, to Tommy's embarrassment. Alan often follows Tommy around, telling him how Tommy helped to win the war, while making predictions about what the post-war world will be like. Among other things, Alan predicts that there will be no more wars, everyone will speak Esperanto and everyone, regardless of race or creed, will have a teasmade. Meanwhile, Miss Land (

Alison Steadman Alison Steadman (born 26 August 1946) is an English actress. She received the 1991 National Society of Film Critics Award for Best Actress for the Mike Leigh film '' Life Is Sweet'' and the 1993 Olivier Award for Best Actress for her role as M ...

) is worried she is pregnant with Tommy's baby, something that would result in her having to resign from her job as an English teacher. She is also dealing with her headmaster's interest in her, a hangover from an apparent affair during the war. When Miss Land and Tommy celebrate what turns out to be a false alarm, they realise they are attracted to each other after all. Later however, police show up at the school and Tommy finds himself under arrest. It is revealed that the stories he has told Alan about fighting at Dunkirk, El Alamein, the

Battle of the Bulge The Battle of the Bulge, also known as the Ardennes Offensive, was the last major German offensive campaign on the Western Front during World War II. The battle lasted from 16 December 1944 to 28 January 1945, towards the end of the war in ...

and

Burma Myanmar, ; UK pronunciations: US pronunciations incl. . Note: Wikipedia's IPA conventions require indicating /r/ even in British English although only some British English speakers pronounce r at the end of syllables. As John Wells explai ...

are untrue: he deserted the war three weeks into his service. While his friends are all interested in talking about sex, which Alan refers to as 'the other thing', he is privately obsessed about kissing Ann Lawton. Ann is not well regarded by Alan's friends, since she is very strait-laced. She also appears to be romantically interested in another boy. Alan sees a golden opportunity when Miss Land casts him and Ann together in a school play where in the final scene they have to kiss.

Cast

*John Albasiny - Alan Duckworth *

- Ann Lawton *Maurice Dee - Geoffrey Whitaker *

- Miss Land *

Frances Ruffelle Frances Ruffelle (born 29 August 1965) is an English musical theatre actress and singer. She won a Tony Award in 1987, and represented the United Kingdom in the 1994 Eurovision Song Contest with the song " Lonely Symphony (We Will Be Free)", ...

- Eunice * Robert Urquhart - Headmaster *

- Tommy *Mark Brailsford - Abbo *Chris Karallis - Shaz *Maurice O'Connell - Gym Teacher *Tim Seeley - French Master *

Richenda Carey Richenda Carey (born 9 April 1948 in Bitton, Gloucestershire) is a British actress who is mostly known for her roles in '' Monarch of the Glen'', ''Jeeves and Wooster'', Darling Buds of May, '' Crush'' and more recently, ''Separate Lies'' and ' ...

- Botany Teacher * Peter Dean - Police Officer * Eric Richard - Road Worker

Filming

Filming took place at Wimbledon Chase Primary School and in the surrounding area.

Box office

Goldcrest Films invested £378,000 in the film and received £749,000 earning them a profit of £371,000.

References

External links

* * {{First Love (Channel 4) 1982 television films 1982 films 1982 romantic drama films 1980s teen drama films British coming-of-age drama films British romantic drama films Channel 4 Films directed by Michael Apted Films set in London Films set in the 1950s 1980s teen romance films 1980s coming-of-age drama films 1980s English-language films 1980s British films British drama television films