Fellatio in Halacha
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Within the guidelines of
halacha ''Halakha'' (; he, הֲלָכָה, ), also transliterated as ''halacha'', ''halakhah'', and ''halocho'' ( ), is the collective body of Jewish religious laws which is derived from the written and Oral Torah. Halakha is based on biblical comman ...
, as presented by '' chazal'' and early rabbinic authorities,
fellatio Fellatio (also known as fellation, and in slang as blowjob, BJ, giving head, or sucking off) is an oral sex act involving a person stimulating the penis of another person by using the mouth, throat, or both. Oral stimulation of the scrotu ...
is classified as ביאה דרך איברים (penetration by way of the limbs) or מעשה חידודים בעלמא (general acts of sharpening). Peripheral halachic discussion of the topic revolves upon whether or not a husband may engage in varying sexually-gratifying acts with his wife – including fellatio – performed up to ejaculation. The opinions below use the term ''biyah sheloh kedarka'' in their original Hebrew text, which refers to anal sex, not any form of extra-vaginal ejaculation. This distinction is very important, as these same authorities do in fact prohibit ejaculation through other forms of extra-vaginal sex, such as
oral sex Oral sex, sometimes referred to as oral intercourse, is sexual activity involving the stimulation of the genitalia of a person by another person using the mouth (including the lips, tongue, or teeth) and the throat. Cunnilingus is oral sex p ...
, etc. Oral sex, up until ejaculation, is entirely permitted according to most Talmudic and halachic authorities. Ejaculation should take place within the vagina. The discussion includes the opinion of the permitting authorities limiting their permit to specific frequencies and timings, the consensus being that any halachic-permit ("''hetter''") is solely applicable within the exclusive framework of a
Torah The Torah (; hbo, ''Tōrā'', "Instruction", "Teaching" or "Law") is the compilation of the first five books of the Hebrew Bible, namely the books of Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers and Deuteronomy. In that sense, Torah means the ...
-permitted marital relationship and strictly during the time that one's wife is not in her ''
niddah Niddah (or nidah; he, נִדָּה), in traditional Judaism, describes a woman who has experienced a uterine discharge of blood (most commonly during menstruation), or a woman who has menstruated and not yet completed the associated requirem ...
'' state.


Maimonides

In the original Hebrew text of the ''
Mishneh Torah The ''Mishneh Torah'' ( he, מִשְׁנֵה תּוֹרָה, , repetition of the Torah), also known as ''Sefer Yad ha-Hazaka'' ( he, ספר יד החזקה, , book of the strong hand, label=none), is a code of Rabbinic Jewish religious law ('' ...
'' of
Maimonides Musa ibn Maimon (1138–1204), commonly known as Maimonides (); la, Moses Maimonides and also referred to by the acronym Rambam ( he, רמב״ם), was a Sephardic Jewish philosopher who became one of the most prolific and influential Tora ...
, he takes a lenient approach that permits all that a man desires to do with his wife. The presentation omits the customary prohibition on extracting semen in vain, which HaRav Yossef Qafih quarantines as an addition by a subsequent unknown editor. Maimonides' commentary to the
Mishnah The Mishnah or the Mishna (; he, מִשְׁנָה, "study by repetition", from the verb ''shanah'' , or "to study and review", also "secondary") is the first major written collection of the Jewish oral traditions which is known as the Oral Tor ...
likewise hints at a lenient stance.


On occasion

Chazal have in certain instances permitted intentional extra-vaginal ejaculation in tandem with one's wife. Tosefot cites the opinion of Rabbi Yitzchak ( Isaac ben Samuel) who permits an occasional complete anal ejaculation with one's wife on condition that one does not accustom himself to ''always'' doing so (Tosfoth,
Yebamot Yevamot ( he, יבמות, "Brother's Widow", also pronounced Yevamos, or Yavmus) is a tractate of the Talmud that deals with, among other concepts, the laws of Yibbum (, loosely translated in English as levirate marriage), and, briefly, with conv ...
h 34b; Tosfoth,
Sanhedrin The Sanhedrin (Hebrew and Aramaic: סַנְהֶדְרִין; Greek: , ''synedrion'', 'sitting together,' hence ' assembly' or 'council') was an assembly of either 23 or 71 elders (known as "rabbis" after the destruction of the Second Temple), ...
58b). The ''Bayit Chadash'' (
Yoel Sirkis Joel ben Samuel Sirkis (Hebrew: רבי יואל בן שמואל סירקיש; born 1561 - March 14, 1640) also known as the Bach (an abbreviation of his magnum opus BAyit CHadash), was a prominent Ashkenazi posek and halakhist, who lived in cent ...
) commentary to the
Rabbeinu Asher Asher ben Jehiel ( he, אשר בן יחיאל, or Asher ben Yechiel, sometimes Asheri) (1250 or 1259 – 1327) was an eminent rabbi and Talmudist best known for his abstract of Talmudic law. He is often referred to as Rabbenu Asher, “our Rabb ...
(ibid.) explicitly permits this foreign ejaculation with Rabbeinu Asher siding with the Tosafist opinion. This opinion is likewise quoted in '' Tur Shulchan Aruch'', ''
Even Ha'ezer ( “The Stone of Help” or “The Rock of the ”) is a section of Rabbi Jacob ben Asher's compilation of halakha (Jewish law), ''Arba'ah Turim''. This section treats aspects of Jewish law related to marriage, divorce, and sexual conduct. Later, ...
'' ch. 25. The ''Bayis Chodosh'' sourced his views based on the Talmudic tract of Yebamoth; Thus Rabbenu Asher, followed by Rabbi
Elijah Spira Elijah Spira (1660–1712) (alternatively, "Shapira" or "Shapiro", Hebrew: אליהו שפירא) was son of Benjamin Wolf Spira. He was a brother-in-law of Rabbi Yaakov Reischer, Rabbi David Oppenheim and a student of Rabbi Avraham Gombiner. He ...
, commented that an occasional anal ejaculation in tandem with one's wife is not considered "extracting semen in vain" (and not banned by the Talmud) as long as the intention is not to avoid impregnating one's wife ''and'' it is done on occasion, as this is not likened to the desire of Onan who wished to avoid impregnating Tamar entirely. The '' Aguddah'' work also sides with the lenient opinion permitting an occasional extra-vaginal ejaculation with one's wife, whilst Rabbi Samuel Eidels (the
Maharsha Shmuel Eidels (1555 – 1631) ( he, שמואל אליעזר הלוי איידלס Shmuel Eliezer HaLevi Eidels) was a renowned rabbi and Talmudist famous for his commentary on the Talmud, ''Chiddushei Halachot''. Eidels is also known as Maharsha ( ...
) likewise taking a lenient view.


Parable of meat and fish

In a varying text of Kallah Rabthi as printed by Rabbi Solomon Aaron Wertheimer in "''Battei Medrashoth''", Rabbi Werthheimer notes the significance of the Talmud quoting both meat and fish in its parable depicting the enhanced permissiveness of sexually gratifying activities that one may perform with his wife. Since the Torah forbids cooking one's meat in milk, a parable quoting just meat would not suffice as meat has this restrictive element whereas fish has a lesser restrictive element, thus implying that man has an enhanced level of (sexual) freedom with his wife.


As often as needed

A more explicit permissive stance is that of the tosafist rabbi Isaiah di Trani the Elder who hints that a complete extra-vaginal ejaculation is permitted whenever needed to "seat" one's desire with the stark exclusion being to avoid pregnancy; Rabbi Isaiah the Elder's view is likewise echoed by his descendant, Rabbi Isaiah di Trani the Younger. Rabbi
Eleazar of Worms Eleazar of Worms (אלעזר מוורמייזא - also מגרמייזא of Garmiza or Garmisa) (c. 1176–1238), or Eleazar ben Judah ben Kalonymus, also sometimes known today as Eleazar Rokeach ("Eleazar the Perfumer" אלעזר רקח) from t ...
, in his recently published Torah commentary to the verse "Adam and his wife, and where not embarrassed" (Genesis) permits any activity with one's wife necessary to "quiet (lit. seat)" his desire.


Active participation

Later rabbinic authorities differentiated between masturbation (self-extracting semen in vain) and an extra-vaginal ejaculation achieved with the active participation of one's Torah-permitted partner—with the former being forbidden under most if not all circumstances. Apparently, any halachic permit for an extra-vaginal ejaculation must be accompanied by the active participation of one's wife. From among rabbis of the
Acharonim In Jewish law and history, ''Acharonim'' (; he, אחרונים ''Aḥaronim''; sing. , ''Aḥaron''; lit. "last ones") are the leading rabbis and poskim (Jewish legal decisors) living from roughly the 16th century to the present, and more specifi ...
, the
Tzemach Tzedek Menachem Mendel Schneersohn (September 9, 1789 – March 17, 1866) also known as the Tzemach Tzedek (Hebrew: "Righteous Sprout" or "Righteous Scion") was an Orthodox rebbe, leading 19th-century posek, and the third rebbe (spiritual leader) of t ...
differentiated between extracting one's seed alone ("masturbation upon trees and stones") and extra-vaginal extracting of one's semen with the active participation of one's wife, with the latter classified as a form of a tandem relationship.Responsa, ch. 89


See also

* Cunnilingus in Halacha * Fellatio in Islam * Judaism and masturbation *
Oral sex Oral sex, sometimes referred to as oral intercourse, is sexual activity involving the stimulation of the genitalia of a person by another person using the mouth (including the lips, tongue, or teeth) and the throat. Cunnilingus is oral sex p ...
*
Oral suction The ''brit milah'' ( he, בְּרִית מִילָה ''bərīṯ mīlā'', ; Ashkenazi pronunciation: , "covenant of circumcision"; Yiddish pronunciation: ''bris'' ) is the ceremony of circumcision in Judaism. According to the Book of Genesis, ...


Further reading

* ''Rabbi, My Husband Wants a Blowjob; A Halachic Analysis of Fellatio'', S. Even-Shoshan


References

{{Marital life in Judaism Fellatio Jewish marital law Judaism and sexuality Judaism and society Judaism and women