Derek and Clive
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Derek and Clive was a double act of comedic characters created by
Dudley Moore Dudley Stuart John Moore CBE (19 April 193527 March 2002) was an English actor, comedian, musician and composer. Moore first came to prominence in the UK as a leading figure in the British satire boom of the 1960s. He was one of the four writ ...
(Derek) and
Peter Cook Peter Edward Cook (17 November 1937 – 9 January 1995) was an English actor, comedian, satirist, playwright and screenwriter. He was the leading figure of the British satire boom of the 1960s, and he was associated with the anti-establishme ...
(Clive) in the 1970s. The performances were captured on the records '' Derek and Clive (Live)'' (1976), '' Derek and Clive Come Again'' (1977), and ''
Derek and Clive Ad Nauseam Derek is a masculine given name. It is the English language short form of ''Diederik'', the Low Franconian form of the name Theodoric. Theodoric is an old Germanic name with an original meaning of "people-ruler". Common variants of the name are ...
'' (1978), as well as in a film documentary, '' Derek and Clive Get the Horn'' (1979). Upon release, more than 100,000 copies of Derek and Clive (Live) were sold in the United Kingdom. A
greatest hits album A greatest hits album or best-of album is a type of compilation album that collects popular and commercially successful songs by a particular artist or band. While greatest hits albums are typically supported by the artist, they can also be creat ...
containing some previously unreleased material, called '' Rude & Rare: The Best of Derek and Clive'', was released in 2011. The characters are foul-mouthed extensions of the earlier characters
Pete and Dud Pete and Dud were characters played by the comedians and entertainers Peter Cook and Dudley Moore. The dialogue format originated in 1964 when Dudley Moore invited Peter Cook to appear in a television performance. Cook scripted a conversation bet ...
. Considered highly offensive by many at the time, the sketches primarily took the form of bizarre, sometime drunken streams of consciousness led by Cook, with interjections from Moore. Memorable moments from the records include Clive claiming that the worst job he ever had was retrieving lobsters from
Jayne Mansfield Jayne Mansfield (born Vera Jayne Palmer; April 19, 1933 – June 29, 1967) was an American actress, singer, nightclub entertainer, and ''Playboy'' Playmate. A sex symbol of the 1950s and early 1960s while under contract at 20th Century Fox, Man ...
's arsehole, Derek claiming his worst job was cleaning up
Winston Churchill Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill (30 November 187424 January 1965) was a British statesman, soldier, and writer who served as Prime Minister of the United Kingdom twice, from 1940 to 1945 during the Second World War, and again from ...
's bogeys (leading the pair to conclude that the ''
Titanic RMS ''Titanic'' was a British passenger liner, operated by the White Star Line, which sank in the North Atlantic Ocean on 15 April 1912 after striking an iceberg during her maiden voyage from Southampton, England, to New York City, Unit ...
'' was one such bogey), Clive claiming that he was sexually aroused by the sight of a deceased
Pope The pope ( la, papa, from el, πάππας, translit=pappas, 'father'), also known as supreme pontiff ( or ), Roman pontiff () or sovereign pontiff, is the bishop of Rome (or historically the patriarch of Rome), head of the worldwide Cathol ...
lying in state, Derek's account of a stranger accosting him and the ensuing profanity-laden conversation between them, followed by Clive's reminiscence of viciously assaulting a man who had said "Hello" to him at a football match, and a horse-racing 'commentary' featuring horses given the names of sexual organs, often in their vulgar forms. Though the recordings were far too crude for a mainstream audience, Derek and Clive bootleg recordings circulated. They were mostly unscripted dialogues incorporating copious swearing – including frequent use of the word " cunt".


Characters

The characters, supposedly two
lavatory Lavatory, Lav, or Lavvy may refer to: *Toilet, the plumbing fixture *Toilet (room), containing a toilet *Public toilet *Aircraft lavatory, the public toilet on an aircraft *Latrine, a rudimentary toilet *A lavatorium, the washing facility in a mon ...
attendants (although in one sketch, 'Back of the Cab', they play the roles of two London taxi drivers) first surfaced in the mid-1970s.


Development of the show

Cook and Moore were performing on
Broadway Broadway may refer to: Theatre * Broadway Theatre (disambiguation) * Broadway theatre, theatrical productions in professional theatres near Broadway, Manhattan, New York City, U.S. ** Broadway (Manhattan), the street **Broadway Theatre (53rd Stree ...
with their revue show ''Good Evening'', a live version of their television series '' Not Only... But Also''. The relationship between the two men had become strained as a result of Cook's worsening
alcoholism Alcoholism is, broadly, any drinking of alcohol that results in significant mental or physical health problems. Because there is disagreement on the definition of the word ''alcoholism'', it is not a recognized diagnostic entity. Predomi ...
. To reassure Moore, Cook hired a recording studio in New York, where the two could simply relax, drink and ad-lib. The resulting recording was padded out with live performances of old favourites, such as "Bo Duddley" and began to circulate as ''Derek and Clive (Live)''. Cook became bemused at the idea that they should not be making money from the increasing popularity of Derek and Clive, and suggested to Moore that the recording should be released officially. By this point, Moore had embarked on a successful Hollywood film career and found the tapes embarrassing, until he too realised his contemporaries were fans. Two more records were made. They were less like dialogues and more like vindictive attacks on the increasingly successful Moore by Cook, whose career had stalled somewhat in comparison. One such merciless assault was in a
cancer Cancer is a group of diseases involving abnormal cell growth with the potential to invade or spread to other parts of the body. These contrast with benign tumors, which do not spread. Possible signs and symptoms include a lump, abnormal b ...
-themed diatribe when Cook was fully aware that Moore had recently lost his father to the disease. The same love-hate relationship between them is evident in the '' Derek and Clive Get the Horn'' movie. It is often mistakenly assumed that all of their releases were recorded while under the influence of alcohol. While this can be presumed of "Come Again" – where the sounds of bottles can be heard in the background, featuring some tracks where both Cook and Moore are slurring their words – the home video release of '' Derek and Clive Get the Horn'' shows a very sober-looking Cook and Moore drinking
coffee Coffee is a drink prepared from roasted coffee beans. Darkly colored, bitter, and slightly acidic, coffee has a stimulating effect on humans, primarily due to its caffeine content. It is the most popular hot drink in the world. Seeds of ...
and
water Water (chemical formula ) is an Inorganic compound, inorganic, transparent, tasteless, odorless, and Color of water, nearly colorless chemical substance, which is the main constituent of Earth's hydrosphere and the fluids of all known living ...
throughout. During the filming, a prank was played upon Cook and Moore by Richard Branson where '
police The police are a constituted body of persons empowered by a state, with the aim to enforce the law, to ensure the safety, health and possessions of citizens, and to prevent crime and civil disorder. Their lawful powers include arrest and th ...
' arrive and suspiciously sniff the contents of an ash tray to the dismay of the unnerved and wary pair. Later CD releases of ''Come Again'' and ''Ad Nauseam'' featured out-takes. Most were recorded during the ''Ad Nauseam'' sessions. Surreal at times, these included "Mother" – featured on '' Derek and Clive Get the Horn'' – where Cook pretends to visit his over-possessive and deranged mother, ending with Cook telling his mother to "shut your fucking face and die". "Valerie's Hymen," where Moore discussed cutting out his wife's hymen with a carving knife, and "Lady Vera Fart Teller", wherein Moore elaborates on a visit to a fortune teller who could tell his future by examining his
fart Flatulence, in humans, is the expulsion of gas from the intestines via the anus, commonly referred to as farting. "Flatus" is the medical word for gas generated in the stomach or bowels. A proportion of intestinal gas may be swallowed environm ...
s. Transcripts of further, unreleased, out-takes are available in a book titled ''Come Again'', edited by William Cook and feature "General
Eisenhower Dwight David "Ike" Eisenhower (born David Dwight Eisenhower; ; October 14, 1890 – March 28, 1969) was an American military officer and statesman who served as the 34th president of the United States from 1953 to 1961. During World War II, ...
", where Cook reflects on the perils of counting the late General's dandruff flakes; "Vietnam", where Moore received a paper cut inflicted by the
Viet Cong , , war = the Vietnam War , image = FNL Flag.svg , caption = The flag of the Viet Cong, adopted in 1960, is a variation on the flag of North Vietnam. Sometimes the lower stripe was green. , active ...
(in one insightful remark Cook mentions a "friend" of his who fought in
Vietnam Vietnam or Viet Nam ( vi, Việt Nam, ), officially the Socialist Republic of Vietnam,., group="n" is a country in Southeast Asia, at the eastern edge of mainland Southeast Asia, with an area of and population of 96 million, making i ...
but he's not sure "on which side"), and "A Million Pounds", where Cook plays an hysterical woman trying to obtain a million pounds from a sympathetic Moore. The remaining unreleased out-takes are variations on actual releases. Tracks from ''Derek and Clive (Live)'', specifically the Bo Duddley sketch, were sampled on one of the first UK house music tracks, 1988's " Voodoo Ray" by
A Guy Called Gerald Gerald Rydel Simpson (born 16 February 1967), better known as A Guy Called Gerald, is a British record producer and musician. He was an early member of the electronic group 808 State, contributing to their debut LP '' Newbuild'' (1988) and hit ...
.


Discography


Albums

* '' Derek and Clive (Live)'' (1976) * '' Derek and Clive Come Again'' (1977) * ''
Derek and Clive Ad Nauseam Derek is a masculine given name. It is the English language short form of ''Diederik'', the Low Franconian form of the name Theodoric. Theodoric is an old Germanic name with an original meaning of "people-ruler". Common variants of the name are ...
'' (1978)


Compilation

* '' Rude & Rare: The Best of Derek and Clive'' (2011)


Videography

* '' Derek and Clive Get the Horn'' (1979, documentary)


References


External links


Derek and Clive – transcripts
{{Authority control English comedy duos Comedy theatre characters Theatre characters introduced in 1976 Male characters in theatre Theatre controversies Fictional British people Dudley Moore Peter Cook