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''The Manipulated Man'' (german: Der Dressierte Mann) is a 1971 book by author
Esther Vilar Esther Margareta Vilar (born Esther Margareta Katzen, September 16, 1935) is an Argentine-German writer. She trained and practised as a medical doctor before establishing herself as an author. She is best known for her 1971 book '' The Manipulated ...
, originally written in German and translated to English by Eva Borneman. The main idea behind the book is that women are not oppressed by men but rather control men to their advantage. A third edition of the book was released in January 2009.


Synopsis

The book argues that, contrary to common
feminist Feminism is a range of socio-political movements and ideologies that aim to define and establish the political, economic, personal, and social equality of the sexes. Feminism incorporates the position that society prioritizes the male po ...
and
women's rights Women's rights are the rights and entitlements claimed for women and girls worldwide. They formed the basis for the women's rights movement in the 19th century and the feminist movements during the 20th and 21st centuries. In some countries, ...
rhetoric, women in industrialized cultures are not oppressed, but rather exploit a well-established system of manipulating men. Vilar writes, "Men have been trained and conditioned by women, not unlike the way Pavlov conditioned his dogs, into becoming their slaves. As compensation for their labours men are given periodic use of a woman's vagina." The book contends that young boys are encouraged to associate their
masculinity Masculinity (also called manhood or manliness) is a set of attributes, behaviors, and roles associated with men and boys. Masculinity can be theoretically understood as socially constructed, and there is also evidence that some behaviors con ...
with their ability to be
sexually intimate Human sexual activity, human sexual practice or human sexual behaviour is the manner in which humans experience and express their sexuality. People engage in a variety of sexual acts, ranging from activities done alone (e.g., masturbation) ...
with a woman, and that a woman can control a man by socially empowering herself to be the gate-keeper to his sense of masculinity. Vilar states that this has been going on for some time. The author says that social definitions and norms, such as the idea that women are weak, are constructed by women with their needs in mind. Vilar explains how it works: if women are viewed as weak, less is expected of them; and therefore they are given more leeway in society than men. Vilar states that women are generally "
gold diggers Gold digger is a term for a person, typically a woman, who engages in a type of transactional relationship for money rather than love. If it turns into marriage, it is a type of marriage of convenience. Etymology and usage The term "gol ...
" who attempt to extract money and other material resources from men. One means by which women control men to effect this transfer of resources is
praise Praise as a form of social interaction expresses recognition, reassurance or admiration. Praise is expressed verbally as well as by body language (facial expression and gestures). Verbal praise consists of a positive evaluations of another's a ...
. Women dole out praise to men only when their needs are met in some way. Another means of manipulation is the calculated use of emotional displays. Vilar claims that women can control their emotional reactions whereas men cannot, and that women create overly-dramatized emotional reactions to get their way: they "blackmail" men emotionally. Women also use sex as a tool of manipulation and control but also traditional concepts of
love Love encompasses a range of strong and positive emotional and mental states, from the most sublime virtue or good habit, the deepest Interpersonal relationship, interpersonal affection, to the simplest pleasure. An example of this range of ...
and
romance Romance (from Vulgar Latin , "in the Roman language", i.e., "Latin") may refer to: Common meanings * Romance (love), emotional attraction towards another person and the courtship behaviors undertaken to express the feelings * Romance languages, ...
, which are seen more positively than
sex Sex is the trait that determines whether a sexually reproducing animal or plant produces male or female gametes. Male plants and animals produce smaller mobile gametes (spermatozoa, sperm, pollen), while females produce larger ones (ova, oft ...
, to control men's sexual lives. Vilar writes that men gain nothing from
marriage Marriage, also called matrimony or wedlock, is a culturally and often legally recognized union between people called spouses. It establishes rights and obligations between them, as well as between them and their children, and between ...
and that women coerce them into it under the pretense that it fulfills their romantic desires. The book closes with Vilar stating that it would be difficult to change the situation by appealing to women, as women are unsympathetic to the plight of men, and unwilling to give up their comfortable position in society. It is up to men to see past the deception and
emotional blackmail Emotional blackmail and FOG are terms popularized by psychotherapist Susan Forward about controlling people in relationships and the theory that fear, obligation and guilt (FOG) are the transactional dynamics at play between the controller and th ...
and subject it to open criticism before any meaningful changes can occur.


Reception

''The Manipulated Man'' was quite popular at the time of its release, in part due to the considerable press coverage it received. Vilar appeared on ''
The Tonight Show ''The Tonight Show'' is an American late-night talk show that has aired on NBC since 1954. The show has been hosted by six comedians: Steve Allen (1954–1957), Jack Paar (1957–1962), Johnny Carson (1962–1992), Jay Leno (1992–2009 and 201 ...
'' on February 21, 1973, to discuss her book. In 1975 she was invited to a televised debate by WDR with
Alice Schwarzer Alice Sophie Schwarzer (born 3 December 1942) is a German journalist and prominent feminist. She is founder and publisher of the German feminist journal '' EMMA''. Beginning in France, she became a forerunner of feminist positions against anti- ...
, who was considered as the leading representative of the women's movement in Germany at that time. The debate provoked controversy, in particular for its high degree of aggression. At one point, for example, Schwarzer claimed Vilar was "not only
sexist Sexism is prejudice or discrimination based on one's sex or gender. Sexism can affect anyone, but it primarily affects women and girls.There is a clear and broad consensus among academic scholars in multiple fields that sexism refers primaril ...
, but
fascist Fascism is a far-right, Authoritarianism, authoritarian, ultranationalism, ultra-nationalist political Political ideology, ideology and Political movement, movement,: "extreme militaristic nationalism, contempt for electoral democracy and pol ...
", and compared her book with the
Nazi Nazism ( ; german: Nazismus), the common name in English for National Socialism (german: Nationalsozialismus, ), is the far-right totalitarian political ideology and practices associated with Adolf Hitler and the Nazi Party (NSDAP) in ...
newspaper ''
Der Stürmer ''Der Stürmer'' (, literally "The Stormer / Attacker / Striker") was a weekly German tabloid-format newspaper published from 1923 to the end of the Second World War by Julius Streicher, the ''Gauleiter'' of Franconia, with brief suspensions ...
''. Vilar stated that she received
death threats A death threat is a threat, often made anonymously, by one person or a group of people to kill another person or group of people. These threats are often designed to intimidate victims in order to manipulate their behaviour, in which case a deat ...
over the book: "So I hadn't imagined broadly enough the isolation I would find myself in after writing this book. Nor had I envisaged the consequences which it would have for subsequent writing and even for my private life—violent threats have not ceased to this date."


Sales

According to research from the Spanish Book Institute, the Spanish translated version (under the title ''El Varón Domado'') was the third-most popular book sold in Spain in 1975.
Folha de S.Paulo ''Folha de S.Paulo'' (sometimes spelled ''Folha de São Paulo''), also known as simply ''Folha'' (, ''Sheet''), is a Brazilian daily newspaper founded in 1921 under the name ''Folha da Noite'' and published in São Paulo by the Folha da Manhã c ...

Ilustrada, p.5, January 28, 1976 (in Portuguese)
- Retrieved December 29, 2011.


See also

*
Antifeminism Antifeminism, also spelled anti-feminism, is opposition to some or all forms of feminism. In the late 19th century and early 20th century, antifeminists opposed particular policy proposals for women's rights, such as the right to vote, educat ...
*
Men Going Their Own Way Men Going Their Own Way (MGTOW ) is an anti-feminist, misogynistic, mostly-online community advocating for men to separate themselves from women and from a society which they believe has been corrupted by feminism. The community is a part o ...


References


External links

*
Pinter & Martin
English publishers {{DEFAULTSORT:Manipulated Man 1971 non-fiction books Criticism of feminism Gender studies literature German books Men's studies literature Masculist books