A stepmother, stepmum or stepmom is a non-biological female parent married to one's preexisting parent.
A stepmother-in-law is a stepmother of one's spouse. Children from her spouse's previous unions are known as her
stepchildren
A stepchild is the offspring of one's spouse, but not one's own offspring, either biologically or through adoption.
Stepchildren can come into a family in a variety of ways. A stepchild may be the child of one's spouse from a previous relationshi ...
.
Culture
Stepparents (mainly stepmothers) may also face some societal challenges due to the stigma surrounding the "evil stepmother" character. Morello notes that the introduction of the "evil stepmother" character in the past is problematic to stepparents today, as it has created a stigma towards stepmothers. The presence of this stigma can have a negative impact on stepmothers' self-esteem.
Fiction
In fiction, stepmothers are often portrayed as being wicked and
evil. The character of the wicked stepmother features heavily in
fairy tales
A fairy tale (alternative names include fairytale, fairy story, magic tale, or wonder tale) is a short story that belongs to the folklore genre. Such stories typically feature magic, enchantments, and mythical or fanciful beings. In most cult ...
; the most famous examples are ''
Cinderella'', ''
Snow White'' and ''
Hansel and Gretel''. Stepdaughters are her most common victim, and then stepdaughter/stepson pairs, but stepsons also are victims as in ''
The Juniper Tree''
[''The Annotated Classic Fairy Tales'', p. 161]—sometimes, as in ''
East of the Sun and West of the Moon'', because he refused to marry his stepsister as she wished, or, indeed, they may make their stepdaughters-in-law their victims, as in ''
The Boys with the Golden Stars''. In some fairy tales, such as
Giambattista Basile's ''La Gatta Cennerentola'' or the Danish ''
Green Knight'', the stepmother wins the marriage by ingratiating herself with the stepdaughter, and once she obtains it, becomes cruel.
In some fairy tales, the stepdaughter's escape by marrying does not free her from her stepmother. After the birth of the stepdaughter's first child, the stepmother may attempt to murder the new mother and replace her with her own daughter—thus making her the stepmother to the next generation. Such a replacement occurs in ''
The Wonderful Birch'', ''
Brother and Sister'', and ''
The Three Little Men in the Wood''; only by foiling the stepmother's plot (and usually executing her), is the story brought to a happy ending. In the Korean Folktale ''
Janghwa Hongryeon jeon'', the stepmother kills her own stepdaughters.
In many stories with evil stepmothers, the hostility between the stepmother and the stepchild is underscored by having the child succeed through aid from the dead mother. This motif occurs from
Norse mythology
Norse, Nordic, or Scandinavian mythology is the body of myths belonging to the North Germanic peoples, stemming from Old Norse religion and continuing after the Christianization of Scandinavia, and into the Nordic folklore of the modern period ...
, where
Svipdagr
Svipdagr (Old Norse: "sudden day"Orchard (1997:157).) is the hero of the two Old Norse Eddaic poems Grógaldr and Fjölsvinnsmál, which are contained within the body of one work; Svipdagsmál.
Plot
Svipdagr is set a task by his stepmother, ...
rouses his mother
Gróa from the grave so as to learn from her how to accomplish a task his stepmother set, to fairy tales such as the
Brothers Grimm version of ''
Cinderella'', where Aschenputtel receives her clothing from a tree growing on her mother's grave, the Russian ''
Vasilissa the Beautiful'', where Vasilissa is aided by a doll her mother gave, and her mother's blessing, and the Malay ''
Bawang Putih Bawang Merah'', where the heroine's mother comes back as fish to protect her.
The notion of the word ''stepmother'' being descriptive of an intrinsically unkind parent is suggested by peculiar wording in John Gamble's "An Irish Wake" (1826). He writes of a woman soon to die, who instructs her successor to "be kind to my children." Gamble writes that the injunction was forgotten and that she "proved a very step-mother."
Fairy tales can have variants where one tale has an evil mother and the other an evil stepmother: in ''
The Six Swans'' by the
Brothers Grimm and also in ''
The Wild Swans'' by
Hans Christian Andersen
Hans Christian Andersen ( , ; 2 April 1805 – 4 August 1875) was a Danish author. Although a prolific writer of plays, travelogues, novels, and poems, he is best remembered for his literary fairy tales.
Andersen's fairy tales, consisti ...
, the heroine is persecuted by her husband's mother and in another one by her stepmother, and in ''
The Twelve Wild Ducks'', by his stepmother. Sometimes this appears to be a deliberate switch: The
Brothers Grimm, having put in their first editions versions of ''
Snow White'' and ''
Hansel and Gretel'' where the villain was the biological mother, altered it to a stepmother in later editions, perhaps to mitigate the story's violence. Another reason for the change from a villainous mother to a villainous stepmother may have been the belief that mothers were sacred, as well as the belief that people would not believe that a mother could harbor such ill-will and animosity toward their child. The Icelandic fairy tale ''
The Horse Gullfaxi and the Sword Gunnfoder'' features a good stepmother, who indeed aids the prince like a
fairy godmother, but this figure is very rare in fairy tales.
The stepmother may be identified with other evils the characters meet. For instance, both the stepmother and the witch in ''Hansel and Gretel'' are deeply concerned with food, the stepmother to avoid hunger, the witch with her house built of food and her desire to eat the children, and when the children kill the witch and return home, their stepmother has mysteriously died.
This hostility from the stepmother and tenderness from the true mother has been interpreted in varying ways. A psychological interpretation, by
Bruno Bettelheim, describes it as "splitting" the actual mother in an ideal mother and a false mother that contains what the child dislikes in the actual mother. However, historically, many women died in childbirth, their husbands remarried, and the new stepmothers competed with the children of the first marriage for resources; the tales can be interpreted as factual conflicts from history. In some fairy tales, such as ''The Juniper Tree'', the stepmother's hostility is overtly the desire to secure the inheritance of her children.
Stepmothers also make many appearances in Chinese tales of family. Wicked stepmothers are common. In ''
Classic of Filial Piety'',
Guo Jujing
Lazzaro Cattaneo (Sarzana, Italy, 1560 - Hangzhou, China, 19 January 1640), (), was an Italian Jesuit missionary who invented the first tone markings for Chinese transcription.
Early life
Cattaneo was born into a noble family at Sarzana, near Gen ...
told the story of
Min Ziqian
Min Sun (536 – BC), also known by his courtesy name Ziqian, was one of the most prominent disciples of Confucius. Confucius considered Min his second best disciple after Yan Hui, and commended him for his filial piety. His legend is included ...
, who had lost his mother at a young age. His stepmother had two more sons and saw to it that they were warmly dressed in winter but neglected her stepson. When her husband discovered this, he decided to divorce her. His son interceded, on the ground that she neglected only him, but when they had no mother, all three sons would be neglected. His father relented, and the stepmother henceforth took care of all three children. For this, he was held up as a model of
filial piety.
Conversely, the exemplary stepmother prefers the stepson to her own child, in recognition that his seniority makes him superior.
[Mark Edward Lewis ''The Early Chinese Empires: Qin and Han'' p. 158 ] The "righteous stepmother of Qi", faced with her son and stepson having been found by a murdered man, and both having confessed to shield the other, argues for her son's execution because her husband had ordered her to look after her stepson, and her son is the junior brother; the king pardoned them both for her devotion to duty.
The ubiquity of the wicked stepmother has made it a frequent theme of
revisionist fairy tale fantasy. This can range from
Tanith Lee's ''Red as Blood'', where the stepmother queen is desperately trying to protect the land from her evil stepdaughter's magic, to
Diana Wynne Jones's ''
Howl's Moving Castle'', where, although it is known that stepmothers are evil, the actual stepmother is guilty of nothing more than some carelessness, to
Erma Bombeck's retelling where
Cinderella is lazy and a liar. More subtly,
Piers Anthony depicted the Princess Threnody as being cursed by her stepmother in ''
Crewel Lye: A Caustic Yarn'': if she ever entered Castle Roogna, it would fall down. But Threnody explains that her presence at the castle caused her father to dote on her and neglect his duties to the destruction of the kingdom; her stepmother had merely made her destructive potential literal, and forced her to confront what she was doing.
The character of the evil stepmother can also be found in the genre of
young adult fiction or young adult social problem novels. In Lisa Heathfield's
Paper Butterflies
Paper is a thin sheet material produced by mechanically or chemically processing cellulose fibres derived from wood, rags, grasses or other vegetable sources in water, draining the water through fine mesh leaving the fibre evenly distributed ...
. the protagonist June suffers horrific abuse at the hands of her stepmother, a fact that she conceals from her father.
Despite many examples of evil or cruel stepmothers, loving stepmothers also exist in fiction. In
Kevin and Kell, Kell is portrayed as loving her stepdaughter Lindesfarne, whom her husband Kevin had adopted during his previous marriage. Likewise, Lindesfarne considers Kell her mother, and has a considerably more favorable view of her than Angelique, Kevin's ex-wife and her adoptive mother, due to feeling neglected by Angelique during her childhood. The Disney film ''
Enchanted'' also makes references to the "evil stepmother" belief, as the villainess is a stepmother, but her wickedness comes from her selfishness and power hungriness rather than the simple fact she is a stepmother. When a little girl tells the heroine Giselle that all stepmothers are evil, Giselle reminds her that she personally knows some wonderful women who were good stepmothers, and the fact a woman is a stepmother does not suddenly change her personality. This is shown later on when Giselle marries that girl's father, who had her from a previous marriage, thus becoming a stepmother herself. As Giselle is a sweet and caring woman, she makes a good wife and stepmother. However, it is notable that during much of that film, Giselle was more of an older sister figure than a maternal figure to that little girl.
In the movie ''
Nanny McPhee'' a group of children worry that their father will remarry, believing from their fairy tales that all stepmothers are an "evil breed." Although they help their father marry again to help keep the family together, their soon-to-be stepmother is very cruel, as they suspected. When the wedding to her is called off, the father decides to marry the much kinder scullery maid, causing one child to comment that the evil stepmother personification does not apply to her.
Stepmother relationships are often examined in
soap operas. An example of this is the long-running rivalry between
Victoria Lord Banks
Victoria Lord is a fictional character and matriarch of the Lord family on the American soap opera ''One Life to Live'', played for over 41 years by six-time Daytime Emmy Award-winning actress Erika Slezak.
The character was created as one of ...
and stepmother
Dorian Lord on the American soap opera ''
One Life to Live
''One Life to Live'' (often abbreviated as ''OLTL'') is an American soap opera broadcast on the ABC television network for more than 43 years, from July 15, 1968, to January 13, 2012, and then on the internet as a web series on Hulu and iTunes ...
''.
In contrast to many other
Disney-related media, the animated series ''
Phineas and Ferb'' features a stepfamily in which both parents get along well with their three children (avoiding the normal tropes of evil stepparents).
In television, ''
Drake & Josh
''Drake & Josh'' is an American teen sitcom created by Dan Schneider for Nickelodeon. The series follows two teenage stepbrothers Drake Parker (Drake Bell) and Josh Nichols (Josh Peck) as they live together despite opposite personalities. The ser ...
'' features a stepfamily in which both parents usually get along well with their three children. In the series ''
The Adventures of Shirley Holmes'', one episode featured a princess who was the heir to the throne of her country and feared that her stepmother wanted to have her assassinated as her own son was next in line after her stepdaughter. The episode concludes the revelation that her stepmother actually wanted her stepdaughter to inherit the throne and had attempted to thwart actual assassins who did not want a woman to rule their country. In ''
Sofia the First'', Sofia's mother Miranda became stepmother to Prince James and Princess Amber, she acknowledged there weren't many tales featuring loving and kind stepmothers. This is another example of a well-blended family.
Classical Literature
Greek
Alcestis (play)
438 BCE: The dying biological mother requests that her husband not remarry, for fear of her children being mistreated by a stepmother.
Hippolytus
428 BCE: The stepmother commits suicide to prevent herself from following through on her lust for her stepson and leaves a note falsely claiming that the stepson had raped her.
References
{{Family
Stepfamily
Parenting
Terms for women
Cinderella characters
Fairy tale stock characters