A stag and doe party, stag and drag party, hen and stag party, buck and doe party, a jack and jill party, or a wedding social is a
Canadian
Canadians (french: Canadiens) are people identified with the country of Canada. This connection may be residential, legal, historical or cultural. For most Canadians, many (or all) of these connections exist and are collectively the source of ...
party and fundraiser for an engaged couple.
Canada
A cultural event in Canada, popular mostly in Manitoba or Ontario under various names to raise money for a couple for their future wedding plans or honeymoon. In
Southern Ontario
Southern Ontario is a primary region of the province of Ontario, Canada, the other primary region being Northern Ontario. It is the most densely populated and southernmost region in Canada. The exact northern boundary of Southern Ontario is disp ...
it may be called a stag and doe, or buck and doe, and in Northwestern Ontario it is called a shag. In Manitoba, this is often called a social or wedding social with less fundraising pressure than seen in Ontario.
The event is usually organized by the bridal party, but in some circumstances may also be held by the
bride
A bride is a woman who is about to be married or who is newlywed.
When marrying, the bride's future spouse, (if male) is usually referred to as the ''bridegroom'' or just ''groom''. In Western culture, a bride may be attended by a maid, brides ...
and
groom
A bridegroom (often shortened to groom) is a man who is about to be married or who is newlywed.
When marrying, the bridegroom's future spouse (if female) is usually referred to as the bride. A bridegroom is typically attended by a best man an ...
before they are
married
Marriage, also called matrimony or wedlock, is a culturally and often legally recognized union between people called spouses. It establishes rights and obligations between them, as well as between them and their children, and between t ...
, similar to a Jack & Jill. It acts as a
fundraiser
Fundraising or fund-raising is the process of seeking and gathering voluntary financial contributions by engaging individuals, businesses, charitable foundations, or governmental agencies. Although fundraising typically refers to efforts to gathe ...
for the
wedding
A wedding is a ceremony where two people are united in marriage. Wedding traditions and customs vary greatly between cultures, ethnic groups, religions, countries, and social classes. Most wedding ceremonies involve an exchange of marriage vo ...
. Guests purchase entrance tickets and are entertained by draws, food and drink, music and fun and games that they will pay for to participate in. It is not a combined stag night/
bachelor party
A bachelor party (in the United States and sometimes in Canada), also known as a stag weekend, stag do or stag party (in the United Kingdom, Commonwealth countries, and Ireland), or a buck's night (in Australia), is a party held/arranged by th ...
and
bachelorette party
A bachelorette party ( United States and Canada) or hen night ( UK, Ireland and Australia) is a party held for a woman (the bride or bride-to-be) who will soon be married. While Beth Montemurro concludes that the bachelorette party is modelled ...
, or
engagement party
An engagement party, also known as a betrothal party or fort, is a party held to celebrate a couple's recent engagement and to help future wedding guests to get to know one another. Traditionally, the bride's parents host the engagement party, but ...
, as the primary focus is to raise money for the engaged couple, so their new life together is not started in debt.
The intent of a stag and doe party is specifically to make a
profit.
Often, people who may not be close enough to the engaged couple to warrant an invitation to the
wedding
A wedding is a ceremony where two people are united in marriage. Wedding traditions and customs vary greatly between cultures, ethnic groups, religions, countries, and social classes. Most wedding ceremonies involve an exchange of marriage vo ...
or reception (especially in the case of a small wedding), will be "tapped" to attend the stag and doe so as to be part of the overall wedding fundraising. Hosting a stag and doe party does not preclude the couple from participating in other wedding-related parties, such as a
bridal shower
A bridal shower is a gift-giving party held for a bride-to-be in anticipation of her wedding.
The history of the custom is rooted not necessarily for the provision of goods for the upcoming matrimonial home, but to provide goods and financial ass ...
,
bachelor party
A bachelor party (in the United States and sometimes in Canada), also known as a stag weekend, stag do or stag party (in the United Kingdom, Commonwealth countries, and Ireland), or a buck's night (in Australia), is a party held/arranged by th ...
,
bachelorette party
A bachelorette party ( United States and Canada) or hen night ( UK, Ireland and Australia) is a party held for a woman (the bride or bride-to-be) who will soon be married. While Beth Montemurro concludes that the bachelorette party is modelled ...
, and so on.
A popular stag and doe tradition is a toonie toss, which has guests toss
toonie
The toonie (also spelled twonie or twoonie), formally the Canadian two-dollar coin (, nicknamed or ), was introduced on February 19, 1996, by Minister of Public Works Diane Marleau. , it possesses the highest monetary value of any circulating ...
s ( coins) at a Texas mickey (3L) bottle of liquor. The toss runs for some time until the Toonie closest to the bottle without making contact wins the bottle.
In Manitoba, in addition to purchasing entrance tickets, guests bid on silent auction prizes, participate in a 50-50 draw, and purchase liquor. Typical food at a Manitoba wedding social includes KUB bread,
cold cuts
Lunch meats—also known as cold cuts, luncheon meats, cooked meats, sliced meats, cold meats, sandwich meats, and deli meats—are precooked or cured meats that are sliced and served cold or hot. They are typically served in sandwiches or on ...
,
cheese
Cheese is a dairy product produced in wide ranges of flavors, textures, and forms by coagulation of the milk protein casein. It comprises proteins and fat from milk, usually the milk of cows, buffalo, goats, or sheep. During production, ...
cubes
In geometry, a cube is a three-dimensional space, three-dimensional solid object bounded by six square (geometry), square faces, Facet (geometry), facets or sides, with three meeting at each vertex (geometry), vertex. Viewed from a corner it i ...
, and
Timbits
A doughnut or donut () is a type of food made from leavened fried dough. It is popular in many countries and is prepared in various forms as a sweet snack that can be homemade or purchased in bakeries, supermarkets, food stalls, and fran ...
.
[Cherniack, Lawrie, and Cy Fien. "Common Law Marriages in Manitoba." Man. LJ 6 (1974): 85.] Often the bridal or wedding shower is held the afternoon before the social. Other times, it is used as a fundraiser for the wedding itself and will be held a few weeks before the day of the wedding.
Other countries
An uncommon event borrowed from the tradition of Canada, and only held in small pockets of certain US States. Guests typically have to purchase a ticket to cover the costs of the event.
Guests could be offered memorabilia such as an engraved cup with the couple's names and wedding date.
References
{{Use dmy dates, date=July 2020
Marriage
Pre-wedding
Canadian traditions