The term significant other (SO) has different uses in psychology and in colloquial language.

Colloquially Colloquialism (), also called colloquial language, everyday language or general parlance, is the style (sociolinguistics), linguistic style used for casual (informal) communication. It is the most common functional style of speech, the idiom norm ...

, "significant other" is used as a

gender-neutral Gender neutrality (adjective form: gender-neutral), also known as gender-neutralism or the gender neutrality movement, is the idea that policies, language, and other social institutions (social structures or gender roles) should avoid distinguish ...

term for a person's partner in an

intimate relationship An intimate relationship is an interpersonal relationship that involves physical or emotional intimacy. Although an intimate relationship is commonly a sexual relationship, it may also be a non-sexual relationship involving family, friends, or ...

without disclosing or presuming anything about

marital status Civil status, or marital status, are the distinct options that describe a person's relationship with a significant other. ''Married'', ''single'', ''divorced'', and ''widowed'' are examples of civil status. ''Civil status'' and ''marital status ...

, relationship status,

gender identity Gender identity is the personal sense of one's own gender. Gender identity can correlate with a person's assigned sex or can differ from it. In most individuals, the various biological determinants of sex are congruent, and consistent with the i ...

, or

sexual orientation Sexual orientation is an enduring pattern of romantic or sexual attraction (or a combination of these) to persons of the opposite sex or gender, the same sex or gender, or to both sexes or more than one gender. These attractions are generall ...

. Synonyms with similar properties include: sweetheart, other half, better half,

spouse A spouse is a significant other in a marriage. In certain contexts, it can also apply to a civil union or common-law marriage. Although a spouse is a form of significant other, the latter term also includes non-marital partners who play a social ...

domestic partner A domestic partnership is a legal relationship, usually between couples, who live together and share a common domestic life, but are not married (to each other or to anyone else). People in domestic partnerships receive benefits that guarantee r ...

, lover,

soulmate A soulmate is a person with whom one has a feeling of deep or natural affinity. This may involve similarity, love, romance, platonic relationships, comfort, intimacy, sexuality, sexual activity, spirituality, compatibility and trust. Defini ...

, and life partner. In the United States, the term is sometimes used in invitations, such as to weddings and office parties. This use of the term has become common in the UK in correspondence from hospitals, e.g., "you may be accompanied for your appointment by a significant other."

Scientific use

Its usage in

psychology Psychology is the scientific study of mind and behavior. Psychology includes the study of conscious and unconscious phenomena, including feelings and thoughts. It is an academic discipline of immense scope, crossing the boundaries betwe ...

and

sociology Sociology is a social science that focuses on society, human social behavior, patterns of Interpersonal ties, social relationships, social interaction, and aspects of culture associated with everyday life. It uses various methods of Empirical ...

is very different from its colloquial use. In psychology, a significant other is any person who has great importance to an individual's life or

well-being Well-being, or wellbeing, also known as wellness, prudential value or quality of life, refers to what is intrinsically valuable relative ''to'' someone. So the well-being of a person is what is ultimately good ''for'' this person, what is in th ...

. In sociology, it describes any person or persons with a strong influence on an individual's

self-concept In the psychology of self, one's self-concept (also called self-construction, self-identity, self-perspective or self-structure) is a collection of beliefs about oneself. Generally, self-concept embodies the answer to the question ''"Who am I? ...

. Although the influence of significant others on individuals was long theorized, the first actual measurements of the influence of significant others on individuals were made by Archie O. Haller, Edward L. Fink, and

Joseph Woelfel Joseph Woelfel (born June 3, 1940) is an American sociologist. Born in Buffalo, New York, he is currently professor in the Department of Communication at the University at Buffalo, The State University of New York. Career Woelfel obtained his BA ...

at the University of Wisconsin. Haller, Fink, and Woelfel are associates of the

Wisconsin model The Wisconsin model of socio-economic attainment is a model that describes and explains an individual's social mobility and its economic, social, and psychological determinants. The logistics of this model are primarily attributed to William H. Se ...

of status attainment. They surveyed 100 Wisconsin adolescents, measured their educational and occupational aspirations, and identified the set of other individuals who communicated with the students and served as examples for them. They then contacted the significant others directly and measured their expectations for the adolescent's educational and occupational attainments, and calculated the impact of these expectations on the aspirations of the students. Results of the research showed that the expectations of significant others were the single most potent influences on the students' own aspirations. This usage is synonymous with the term "relevant other" and can also be found in plural form, "significant others". In

social psychology Social psychology is the scientific study of how thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are influenced by the real or imagined presence of other people or by social norms. Social psychologists typically explain human behavior as a result of the r ...

, a significant other is an "insulating person", uncle/aunt, grandparent, guardian or teacher – the person who guides and takes care of a child during primary

socialization In sociology, socialization or socialisation (see spelling differences) is the process of internalizing the norms and ideologies of society. Socialization encompasses both learning and teaching and is thus "the means by which social and cultur ...

. The significant other protects, rewards, and punishes the child as a way of aiding the child's development. This usually takes about six or seven years, after which the significant other is no longer needed, and the child moves on to a general "other" which is not a real person, but an abstract notion of what

society A society is a group of individuals involved in persistent social interaction, or a large social group sharing the same spatial or social territory, typically subject to the same political authority and dominant cultural expectations. Socie ...

deems good or bad.

First use

The first known use of the terms "significant other person" and "significant other people" is by the U.S.

psychiatrist A psychiatrist is a physician who specializes in psychiatry, the branch of medicine devoted to the diagnosis, prevention, study, and treatment of mental disorders. Psychiatrists are physicians and evaluate patients to determine whether their sy ...

Harry Stack Sullivan Herbert "Harry" Stack Sullivan (February 21, 1892, Norwich, New York – January 14, 1949, Paris, France) was an American Neo-Freudian psychiatrist and psychoanalyst who held that "personality can never be isolated from the complex interpersonal ...

in the article "Conceptions of Modern Psychiatry" in the journal: ''Psychiatry: Journal of the biology and pathology of interpersonal relations'', published in 1940. The phrase was popularised in the United States by

Armistead Maupin Armistead Jones Maupin, Jr. ( ) (born May 13, 1944) is an American writer notable for ''Tales of the City'', a series of novels set in San Francisco. Early life Maupin was born in Washington, D.C., to Diana Jane (Barton) and Armistead Jones Maup ...

's 1987 book '' Significant Others'', and in the UK by the 1989 TV series ''

Only Fools and Horses ''Only Fools and Horses....'' is a British television sitcom created and written by John Sullivan. Seven series were originally broadcast on BBC One in the United Kingdom from 1981 to 1991, with sixteen sporadic Christmas specials aired until t ...

'', in which

Derek Trotter Derek Edward Trotter, more commonly known as Del Boy, is a fictional character from the BBC sitcom ''Only Fools and Horses'' and one of the main characters of its spinoff series, '' Rock & Chips''. He was played by David Jason in the original s ...

uses the phrase a number of times when referring to his long-term partner

Raquel Turner Rachel "Raquel" Turner (formerly Slater; born 4 June 1957See ) is a fictional character from the BBC television sit-com ''Only Fools and Horses'', in which she is Del Boy's long-term partner. She is portrayed by Tessa Peake-Jones. Character ...

References

{{Interpersonal relationships footer Marriage, unions and partnerships Social philosophy Gender-neutral language

Scientific use

First use

See also

References