A personality clash occurs when two (or more) people find themselves in conflict not over a particular issue or incident, but due to a fundamental incompatibility in their personalities, their approaches to things, or their
style of life
The term style of life (german: Lebensstil) was used by psychiatrist Alfred Adler as one of several constructs describing the dynamics of the personality.
Origins
Adler was influenced by the writings of Hans Vaihinger, and his concept of fictional ...
.
A personality clash may occur in work-related, school-related, family-related, or social situations.
Types
Carl Jung
Carl Gustav Jung ( ; ; 26 July 1875 – 6 June 1961) was a Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst who founded analytical psychology. Jung's work has been influential in the fields of psychiatry, anthropology, archaeology, literature, philo ...
saw the polarity of
extraversion and introversion
The traits of extraversion (also spelled extroversion Retrieved 2018-02-21.) and introversion are a central dimension in some human personality theories. The terms ''introversion'' and ''extraversion'' were introduced into psychology by Carl J ...
as a major potential cause of personality conflicts in everyday life, as well as underlying many past intellectual and philosophical disputes.
He also opposed thinking and feeling types, intuitive and sensation types, as potential sources of misunderstanding between people; while other typologies can and have been developed since.
In the workplace
The issue of personality clashes in the workplace is controversial. According to the Australian government, the two types of workplace conflicts are when people's ideas, decisions or actions relating directly to the job are in opposition, or when two people simply don't get along. Turner and Weed argue that in a conflict situation, don’t ask who, ask what and why. Managers should avoid blaming interpersonal conflicts on personality clashes. Such a tactic is an excuse to avoid addressing the real causes of conflict, and the department’s performance will suffer as a result. Managers must be able to recognize the signs of conflict behaviors and deal with the conflict in a forthright fashion. Approaching conflicts as opportunities to improve departmental policies and operations rather as ailments to be eradicated or ignored will result in a more productive work force and greater departmental efficiency. However, in order to avoid recognizing harsher business bullying situations, employers are more likely to refer to these actions as a personality clash.
In therapy
Sigmund Freud
Sigmund Freud ( , ; born Sigismund Schlomo Freud; 6 May 1856 – 23 September 1939) was an Austrian neurologist and the founder of psychoanalysis, a clinical method for evaluating and treating psychopathology, pathologies explained as originatin ...
thought a harmonious match of therapist and patient was essential for psychotherapy; but subsequent experience has demonstrated that success can follow even where there is an underlying personality clash.
Neville Symington
Neville Symington (3 July 1937 - 3 December 2019) was a member of the Middle Group of British Psychoanalysts which argues that the primary motivation of the child is object-seeking rather than drive gratification. He published a number of books ...
indeed saw a patient's willingness to proceed with therapy, ''despite'' her dislike of him, as a positive sign of health, and as a beginning repudiation of her
narcissism
Narcissism is a self-centered personality style characterized as having an excessive interest in one's physical appearance or image and an excessive preoccupation with one's own needs, often at the expense of others.
Narcissism exists on a co ...
.
Remedies
Some suggest that the only answer to a personality clash is the
folk remedy
Traditional medicine (also known as indigenous medicine or folk medicine) comprises medical aspects of traditional knowledge that developed over generations within the folk beliefs of various societies, including indigenous peoples, before the ...
of distancing - reducing contact with the clashing personality involved. Other recommendations are to focus on the positives in the other person, and to examine one's own psychodynamics for clues as to why one is finding them so difficult - perhaps due to a
projection
Projection, projections or projective may refer to:
Physics
* Projection (physics), the action/process of light, heat, or sound reflecting from a surface to another in a different direction
* The display of images by a projector
Optics, graphic ...
of some unacknowledged part of one's own personality.
Howard Gardner
Howard Earl Gardner (born July 11, 1943) is an American developmental psychologist and the John H. and Elisabeth A. Hobbs Research Professor of Cognition and Education at the Harvard Graduate School of Education at Harvard University. He is cur ...
saw a major part of what he called
interpersonal intelligence
The theory of multiple intelligences proposes the differentiation of human intelligence into specific modalities of intelligence, rather than defining intelligence as a single, general ability. The theory has been criticized by mainstream psych ...
as the ability to mediate and resolve such personality clashes from the outside.
Examples
Actual
* Circumstances conspired to produce a painful personality clash between the ordered, cerebral, emotionally contained
A. J. P. Taylor
Alan John Percivale Taylor (25 March 1906 – 7 September 1990) was a British historian who specialised in 19th- and 20th-century European diplomacy. Both a journalist and a broadcaster, he became well known to millions through his televis ...
, and the spendthrift, bohemian, expansive
Dylan Thomas
Dylan Marlais Thomas (27 October 1914 – 9 November 1953) was a Welsh poet and writer whose works include the poems "Do not go gentle into that good night" and "And death shall have no dominion", as well as the "play for voices" ''Under ...
.
* The clash between the cautious, moderate
Harley Harley may refer to:
People
* Harley (given name)
* Harley (surname)
Places
* Harley, Ontario, a township in Canada
* Harley, Brant County, Ontario, Canada
* Harley, Shropshire, England
* Harley, South Yorkshire, England
* Harley Street, in L ...
and the mercurial, extremist
Bolingbroke at the close of Queen Anne's reign did much to usher in the long
Whig ascendency
Whig or Whigs may refer to:
Parties and factions
In the British Isles
* Whigs (British political party), one of two political parties in England, Great Britain, Ireland, and later the United Kingdom, from the 17th to 19th centuries
** Whiggism ...
that followed.
* The personality clash between
Henry Tizard
Sir Henry Thomas Tizard (23 August 1885 – 9 October 1959) was an English chemist, inventor and Rector of Imperial College, who developed the modern "octane rating" used to classify petrol, helped develop radar in World War II, and led the fir ...
and
Frederick Lindemann
Frederick Alexander Lindemann, 1st Viscount Cherwell, ( ; 5 April 18863 July 1957) was a British physicist who was prime scientific adviser to Winston Churchill in World War II.
Lindemann was a brilliant intellectual, who cut through bureauc ...
had adverse effects on the Allied conduct of World War Two.
Literary
*
C. P. Snow
Charles Percy Snow, Baron Snow, (15 October 1905 – 1 July 1980) was an English novelist and physical chemist who also served in several important positions in the British Civil Service and briefly in the UK government.''The Columbia Encyclope ...
in his semi-autobiographical novel on the
corridors of power described caballing with someone whose temperament "clashed right at the roots with mine: even if he was not being offensive, he would have tempted me to say something hard. But I was doing a job, and I couldn't afford luxuries, certainly not the luxury of being myself".
[C. P. Snow, ''Corridors of Power'' (1975) p. 132]
See also
References
Further reading
* C. G. Jung, ''Psychological Types'' (London 1971)
* Ronald W. Clark, ''Tizard'' (London 1965)
External links
Philip Landau, 'When personalities clash''Workplace conflict'
{{Workplace
Personality
Organizational conflict