Off the ''derech'' ( he, דֶּרֶךְ,
pronounced: ,
meaning: path) (OTD) is a
Yeshiva-English expression used to describe a
Jew
Jews ( he, יְהוּדִים, , ) or Jewish people are an ethnoreligious group and nation originating from the Israelites Israelite origins and kingdom: "The first act in the long drama of Jewish history is the age of the Israelites""Th ...
who has left an
Orthodox Jewish
Orthodox Judaism is the collective term for the traditionalist and theologically conservative branches of contemporary Judaism. Theologically, it is chiefly defined by regarding the Torah, both Written and Oral, as revealed by God to Moses on M ...
community. Despite its negative connotation in insinuating that the exiter has left a single acceptable path, the term has been
reclaimed
Land reclamation, usually known as reclamation, and also known as land fill (not to be confused with a waste landfill), is the process of creating new land from oceans, seas, riverbeds or lake beds. The land reclaimed is known as reclamati ...
and used by some OTD individuals and groups to self describe. "Off the ''derech''" as a term applies to a broad range of formerly Orthodox Jewish individuals including those who leave
Hasidic
Hasidism, sometimes spelled Chassidism, and also known as Hasidic Judaism (Ashkenazi Hebrew: חסידות ''Ḥăsīdus'', ; originally, "piety"), is a Jewish religious group that arose as a spiritual revival movement in the territory of contem ...
communities, other types of
Haredi
Haredi Judaism ( he, ', ; also spelled ''Charedi'' in English; plural ''Haredim'' or ''Charedim'') consists of groups within Orthodox Judaism that are characterized by their strict adherence to ''halakha'' (Jewish law) and traditions, in oppos ...
communities, and
Modern Orthodox
Modern may refer to:
History
*Modern history
** Early Modern period
** Late Modern period
*** 18th century
*** 19th century
*** 20th century
** Contemporary history
* Moderns, a faction of Freemasonry that existed in the 18th century
Philosoph ...
communities, and whose new lifestyles can be
other forms of Judaism, or no religion at all.
Leaving the
ultra Orthodox
Haredi Judaism ( he, ', ; also spelled ''Charedi'' in English; plural ''Haredim'' or ''Charedim'') consists of groups within Orthodox Judaism that are characterized by their strict adherence to ''halakha'' (Jewish law) and traditions, in oppos ...
community is largely reported to be a hard experience emotionally, socially and financially, often involving multiple risks and losses. There is a wide and varied array of reasons given for leaving. A significant number of studies seek to examine these reasons, and the combination of their findings suggests that exiting is a complex, multifaceted phenomenon which can be defined in several ways: disaffiliation as immigration, disaffiliation as apostasy, liberation from a coercive group, and standing for one’s identity; nevertheless, a common denominator between all of the natratives is an intensity in the individuals' desire to leave, underscored by their readiness to pay the high price involved.
The OTD phenomenon is of interest to Orthodox Jews, non-Orthodox Jews, members of the general public, and the exiters themselves, bringing forth a variety of representations and narratives which are expressed in forms of memoirs, podcasts, studies, film & TV, and opinion pieces.
Aggregations of ex-Orthodox individuals may comprise a
social movement
A social movement is a loosely organized effort by a large group of people to achieve a particular goal, typically a social or political one. This may be to carry out a social change, or to resist or undo one. It is a type of group action and may ...
. Reports show the rates of attrition from Orthodox Judaism in the US and the UK to be at 33%-52%. Similar trends in leaving religion exist in
Islam
Islam (; ar, ۘالِإسلَام, , ) is an Abrahamic religions, Abrahamic Monotheism#Islam, monotheistic religion centred primarily around the Quran, a religious text considered by Muslims to be the direct word of God in Islam, God (or ...
,
Mormonism
Mormonism is the religious tradition and theology of the Latter Day Saint movement of Restorationist Christianity started by Joseph Smith in Western New York in the 1820s and 1830s. As a label, Mormonism has been applied to various aspects of t ...
, and
evangelical Christianity
Evangelicalism (), also called evangelical Christianity or evangelical Protestantism, is a worldwide Interdenominationalism, interdenominational movement within Protestantism, Protestant Christianity that affirms the centrality of being "bor ...
.
Terminology
Pre-20th Century
Within religious Jewish verbiage, the term "
apostate
Apostasy (; grc-gre, ἀποστασία , 'a defection or revolt') is the formal disaffiliation from, abandonment of, or renunciation of a religion by a person. It can also be defined within the broader context of embracing an opinion that ...
" (or ''"meshumad"'') is traditionally reserved for those who exchange the Jewish faith for another religion, especially Christianity or Islam, which is seen as an active renunciation of Jewish identity, whereas being a secularist Jew is not. Jewish communities did not historically have a term for those who left all faith, save for the term ''"
epikoros
Epikoros (or Apikoros or Apikores; he, אפיקורוס, lit. " Epicurus", pl. Epicorsim) is a Jewish term figuratively meaning "a heretic", cited in the Mishnah, referring to one who does not have a share in the world to come:
The rabbinic li ...
"'' defining an "informed
heretic". When individuals left to join a secular movement in the 19th and early 20th centuries, their secularity was often referred to by the name of the party they had joined. For example, those who left Orthodox observance to join the Zionist movement were simply referred to as Zionists, which implied a connection to both Zionism and secularity.
Though people have left religious Judaism throughout history, the term "off the ''derech''" is anachronistic if used to describe an individual who lived before the 20th century. The contemporary phenomenon of OTD shares some similarities with the
Haskalah
The ''Haskalah'', often termed Jewish Enlightenment ( he, השכלה; literally, "wisdom", "erudition" or "education"), was an intellectual movement among the Jews of Central and Eastern Europe, with a certain influence on those in Western Euro ...
movement in its disaffection with traditional modes of religion, its secularization and interest in secular education, and in experimenting with a secular Jewish culture. Like Haskalah, its members tend to be secularists and religious
decentralists. However, sociological factors between pre-20th-century leavers and contemporary leavers are significantly different.
Contemporary
With the rise of the contemporary trend of individuals exiting of Orthodoxy, in seeking to describe one who had left, Orthodox Jews coined the term "off the ''derech''", the term denoting that the individual had left what they considered to be the one true path. The term ''"apikorus"'' is still often used jointly for outspoken
atheists
Atheism, in the broadest sense, is an absence of belief in the existence of deities. Less broadly, atheism is a rejection of the belief that any deities exist. In an even narrower sense, atheism is specifically the position that there no d ...
and
agnostics
Agnosticism is the view or belief that the existence of God, of the divine or the supernatural is unknown or unknowable. (page 56 in 1967 edition) Another definition provided is the view that "human reason is incapable of providing sufficient ...
.
Some OTD individuals and groups have
reclaimed
Land reclamation, usually known as reclamation, and also known as land fill (not to be confused with a waste landfill), is the process of creating new land from oceans, seas, riverbeds or lake beds. The land reclaimed is known as reclamati ...
the term, and often use it to describe themselves despite the previous negative connotations. In using it upon themselves, some simply make use of it as a convenient shorthand, while others place deliberate positive connotations on the term. "Off the derech" can be used as a liberating phrase in the sense of being off a narrow and previously restricting path, and the acronym OTD can be used to mean "on the ''derech"'', implying that these individuals have found their own paths. Within the broad range of OTD individuals and groups, there is a difference of opinion on whether it is better to reclaim the term or to use a new one altogether. One alternative is XO, a term coined by an OTD individual to signify "ex-Orthodox" while also playing on
a term for "love".
In
Modern Hebrew
Modern Hebrew ( he, עברית חדשה, ''ʿivrít ḥadašá ', , '' lit.'' "Modern Hebrew" or "New Hebrew"), also known as Israeli Hebrew or Israeli, and generally referred to by speakers simply as Hebrew ( ), is the standard form of the He ...
, the process of halting or decreasing religious observance is known as . This term, loosely translated as "leaving in question," plays on
"returning in repentance", the popular term for those who move in the other direction by becoming Orthodox after being raised without Orthodoxy.
Demographics
United States
A 2013 survey on American Jews conducted by the
Pew Research Center
The Pew Research Center is a nonpartisan American think tank (referring to itself as a "fact tank") based in Washington, D.C.
It provides information on social issues, public opinion, and demographic trends shaping the United States and the w ...
which included more than 500 Orthodox participants, found that 52% of Jewish adults who were raised Orthodox, were no longer Orthodox. When subdivided by age, it found that it was 17% for those under the age of 30, 59% for those aged 50–64, and 78% for those aged 65 and above. Some experts think that the higher attrition rate in the older age groups is likely "a period effect in which people who came of age during the 1950s, 1960s and 1970s left Orthodoxy in large numbers." A subsequent 2020 study found the attrition rate to be at 33%.
United Kingdom
The
JPR's preliminary research report from the 2013 National Jewish Community Survey, showed that 36% of participants who were raised Central Orthodox, were no longer Orthodox (an additional 6% had gone "right" to Haredi Orthodoxy). There was no data available to demonstrate shifts in the British Haredi community.
Reasons for leaving
One study by Roni Berger found four milestones common in the narratives of study participants: 1) initial questioning; 2) growing doubts; 3) beginning to share selectively with a small group of trusted others; 4) revealing a new and altered identity. This process of
religious disaffiliation
Religious disaffiliation is the act of leaving a faith, or a religious group or community. It is in many respects the reverse of religious conversion. Several other terms are used for this process, though each of these terms may have slightly diffe ...
is echoed by Helen Rose Fuchs Ebaugh (1988) in an article about ex-nuns. In the case of nuns, Ebuagh says the process is 1) first doubts; 2) seeking and weighing role alternatives; 3) a turning point; 4) establishing an ex-role identity.
Lynn Davidman
Lynn Rita Davidman (born 1955) is an American sociologist. She is the distinguished professor of modern Jewish studies and professor of sociology at the University of Kansas.
Early life and education
Davidman was born in New York City to a Mode ...
's book acknowledges the often messy process of leaving, including a period of "passing" when individuals would move between two worlds.
This period is characterized by confusion, doubts, depression, and defiance, but also by self-confidence and courage to leave the regimented world they grew up in and begin to live in another world.
In addition, because of the community's insularity, some people who experience the first stages of doubt, confusion, and depression don't see a way out and instead reconcile themselves to remaining.
An individual's decision to discontinue practicing Orthodox Judaism is likely based on the presence of one or more of three key causes: emotional, intellectual, or implementational issues. Nishma Research carried out a survey of OTD individuals in 2016, which recorded a widely-varied and complex set of reasons people give for leaving, and the process in which they do so.
The Nishma study, as well as a study by
Faranak Margolese
Faranak Margolese ( he, פאראנאק מרגוליס, born 1972) is an American-Israeli writer, best known as the author of ''Off the Derech'', a book about contemporary assimilation in the Orthodox Jewish world.
Early life and education
Marg ...
, who wrote the book, ''Off the Derech: Why Observant Jews Leave Judaism; How to Respond to the Challenge'', came to the conclusion that: "Most formerly observant Jews today seem to have left, not
r, in the Nishma study - not so muchbecause the outside world pulled them in, but, rather, because the observant one pushed them out. They experienced Judaism as a source of pain ... so they did what was natural: go in the other direction.".
These and other studies point to the social and emotional aspect of Haredi Judaism, and individuals' feelings of being silenced, marginalized, or ignored within the rigid social structure.
Some selected reasons revealed by these studies include bad behavior and perceived hypocrisy in the community, especially from community leaders; oppressive community norms; experiencing religious observance as a condition for parents' or teachers' love or approval; experiencing
molestation
Sexual abuse or sex abuse, also referred to as molestation, is abusive sexual behavior by one person upon another. It is often perpetrated using force or by taking advantage of another. Molestation often refers to an instance of sexual assau ...
,
rape
Rape is a type of sexual assault usually involving sexual intercourse or other forms of sexual penetration carried out against a person without their consent. The act may be carried out by physical force, coercion, abuse of authority, or ag ...
, or other
sexual abuse
Sexual abuse or sex abuse, also referred to as molestation, is abusive sexual behavior by one person upon another. It is often perpetrated using force or by taking advantage of another. Molestation often refers to an instance of sexual assa ...
; difficulty reconciling strict interpretations of Torah and Talmud with knowledge of natural science; disbelief that the Torah or Jewish path is correct.
Sexual abuse is indeed found to be reported among OTD individuals at a much higher rate than among the overall Orthodox and general population. According to a study by Rosmarin et al. (2018), compared to currently Orthodox and those never affiliated with Orthodox Judaism, formerly Orthodox people were more than four times as likely to report involuntary childhood sex. J Engelman et al.'s 2019 study on OTD adults reports that 25% of male respondents and 30% of female respondents said that they had experienced sexual abuse within Orthodox Jewish communities, though the questioning was not specific enough to determine the prevalence of sexual abuse in minors.
Orthodox views of OTD people
The family and the Orthodox community at large
see
See or SEE may refer to:
* Sight - seeing
Arts, entertainment, and media
* Music:
** ''See'' (album), studio album by rock band The Rascals
*** "See", song by The Rascals, on the album ''See''
** "See" (Tycho song), song by Tycho
* Television
* ...
attrition from Orthodoxy as a serious problem for Jews as it threatens the Orthodox population of Jews, causes
assimilation, and breaks the
intergenerational chain of the Orthodox
traditions and
laws for living. The attitudes of Orthodox individuals and leaders toward those who have left range from considering them
heretics
Heresy is any belief or theory that is strongly at variance with established beliefs or customs, in particular the accepted beliefs of a church or religious organization. The term is usually used in reference to violations of important religi ...
to be shunned and/or mourned as dead (the latter having fallen out of vogue more recently), to regarding them as being wayward people in pain who must be shown love. The attitude of showing love to those perceived as being in pain is most often seen in regard to teens. The term "teens at risk", generally used for those at risk of
drug addiction
Addiction is a neuropsychological disorder characterized by a persistent and intense urge to engage in certain behaviors, one of which is the usage of a drug, despite substantial harm and other negative consequences. Repetitive drug use of ...
,
depression, or
suicide
Suicide is the act of intentionally causing one's own death. Mental disorders (including depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, personality disorders, anxiety disorders), physical disorders (such as chronic fatigue syndrome), and s ...
, was adapted by Orthodox people to include those at a "spiritual risk" involving a decline in observance, a decline in spiritual beliefs, and violation of socio-cultural norms and rules, elements which can manifest into leaving Orthodox Judaism.
Steinberg's study (2021), which focused on OTD individuals who originate from the Yeshivish (
Lithuanian Haredi) sect, concludes that "In the Yeshivish world it appears that
he familyremaining close, not cutting off a child because they are OTD, is a pattern and not an exception". In a
Mishpacha
''Mishpacha'' ( he, משפחה, : Family) - Jewish Family Weekly is a Haredi weekly magazine package produced by The Mishpacha Group in both English and Hebrew.
History
The Mishpacha Publishing Group was founded in 1984 with the publication ...
interview with Shimon Schneebalg, a Hasidic Rabbi in Israel, the Rabbi addressed parents of OTD children, encouraging them to fully accept that their child has taken "a different path", and to love their child unconditionally. In 2018, a remarkable video of
Rabbi Gershon Eidelstein circulated, in which he was filmed saying that parents of an OTD son should not reprimand their child for bringing a girlfriend into the home or lighting a cigarette on
shabbos
Shabbat (, , or ; he, שַׁבָּת, Šabbāṯ, , ) or the Sabbath (), also called Shabbos (, ) by Ashkenazim, is Judaism's day of rest on the seventh day of the week—i.e., Saturday. On this day, religious Jews remember the biblical storie ...
.
Agudath Israel of America
Agudath Israel of America ( he, אגודת ישראל באמריקה) (also called Agudah) is an American organization that represents Haredi Orthodox Jews. It is loosely affiliated with the international World Agudath Israel. Agudah seeks to ...
, a leading ultra-Orthodox organization, addresses the topic of individuals leaving Orthodox Judaism often. At their national conventions in 2015 and 2016, they addressed the topic in panels titled "OTD: Why Do They Leave? And What Can We Do About It?",
and "Diving Off The Derech: The Emerging Adult At Risk Phenomenon".
For those who leave and are married with children, the community tends to embrace the spouse left behind and help raise funds for legal support to help that person retain custody of the children, sometimes accomplished through community emergency fundraising appeals which are backed by the Haredi community leadership. One such event in 2016 in
Stamford Hill, London was graced by the presence of senior
rebbe
A Rebbe ( yi, רבי, translit=rebe) or Admor ( he, אדמו״ר) is the spiritual leader in the Hasidic movement, and the personalities of its dynasties.Heilman, Samuel"The Rebbe and the Resurgence of Orthodox Judaism."''Religion and Spiritua ...
s who had flown in from Israel to attend, which helped to attract a reported 1,500 strong attendance, each of whom were asked for a minimum donation of £500. A flyer calling to the event contained a letter from
Rabbi Ephraim Padwa, spiritual head of the
UOHC, in which he wrote: "To our great pain, and our misfortune, our community finds itself in a terrible situation – 17 of our pure and holy children where one of the parents, God rescue them, have gone out into an evil culture, and want to drag their children after them."
Orthodox leaders and parents have set up organizations to counsel those whose relatives are OTD. Some of the organizations include Project Yes, MASK (Mothers and Fathers Aligned Saving Kids). Additionally, Shabbatons, groups, and events are organized to support parents dealing with an OTD child. Rabbis and leaders also provide support and advice for children whose parents have left Orthodoxy.
Haredi community members interviewed by the
BBC #REDIRECT BBC #REDIRECT BBC
Here i going to introduce about the best teacher of my life b BALAJI sir. He is the precious gift that I got befor 2yrs . How has helped and thought all the concept and made my success in the 10th board exam. ...
...
"argue that the stories of people who leave cast the community - a vulnerable minority at risk of anti-semitic attack - in a bad light and that it’s unfair."
A hashtag trend #MyOrthodoxLife followed the release of the 2021 reality TV show ''
'', and similar campaigns often arise when OTD narratives are in the spotlight.
Multiple hardships and losses are involved in one's process of disaffiliation from Orthodox Jewish communities, especially from Haredi Orthodoxy, which can include loss of family, loss of employment, divorce,
, and loss of community and social structure.
Additionally, those who leave must adjust and acculturate to new ways of life and thinking outside of their communities of origin.
Individuals who leave ultra-Orthodox Judaism often face rejection from friends and family members. This knowledge often leads individuals who have doubts to first try to reconcile their doubts, in order to avoid the risk of losing family and friends. At this stage, individuals often experience
.
.
's 2015 suicide was covered by some media outlets, which led to a spate of think-pieces about OTD suicides. Although reports of a higher than average suicide rate among OTD have been heard, experts have highlighted that they are
available to back up the claims. Leaving any faith-based community often has traumatic effects; for many, losing a lifelong sense of reliance and security through believing in
can be a difficult adjustment. OTD individuals also struggle with ingrained ideas about
, often leading to extreme feelings of guilt.
as a way of punishing themselves for perceived wrongs towards God, family and community.
While psychological effects can be overwhelming in the initial years after leaving, the majority of OTD individuals report satisfaction with their choices. In Engelman's 2019 survey, 59% reported that they accomplished the goals they expected by leaving; 30% reported that they somewhat accomplished those goals; and 11% reported that they did not accomplish those goals.
Leaving the community entails adjusting to a secular world where attitudes to many subjects are different and social life works differently. Some find it hard to adapt to aspects of the general public's day to day lifestyle, which can leave them with feelings of inadequacy and alienation. Leaving a close-knit community where every member of the community is taken care of is often financially challenging as well.
Individuals who leave ultra-Orthodox communities often have difficulty maintaining contact with families who may disapprove of their choices. To counteract the feelings of isolation and alienation, many individuals form groups of friends who get together for Shabbat dinners and other practices with cultural significance.
Some Orthodox Jews remain in the community despite losing their faith. In the 2016 Nishma survey of OTD individuals, 33% of the respondents reported that they were posing as religious. These people are sometimes referred to as
. The decision to stay is often influenced by fear of being ostracized and having to rebuild community, or by fear of losing one's spouse and/or children.
to avoid being outed. 39% of double-lifers say it is likely they will leave their community at some point.
by founding, or volunteering within, organizations which advocate for specific changes within the community. Some examples include ZAAKAH, which works to prevent
, which advocates for basic secular education among ultra-Orthodox Jews especially amid
causes.
Many formerly Orthodox individuals seek community and discussion about their former beliefs and new lives in online and in-person groups. ''
, founded in New York in December 2003 to help ultra-Orthodox Jews who want to explore the option of leaving their insular communities. is its equivalent in Israel,
in the UK, and Gesher for the UK as well as for Europe in general. Project Makom was founded in July 2014, and "helps former and questioning Charedi Jews find their place in Orthodoxy".
Informal communities have also developed on websites,
groups.
Recently, a number of stories of people leaving Orthodox Judaism have gained a degree of fame in the general public's eye.
', Devora Publishing, 2005.
* {{Citation , url=http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/8435275.stm , title=High cost of leaving ultra-orthodox Judaism , newspaper=
...