Humour
Humour (English in the Commonwealth of Nations, Commonwealth English) or humor (American English) is the tendency of experiences to provoke laughter and provide amusement. The term derives from the humorism, humoral medicine of the ancient Gre ...
and jokes about one's mother-in-law (the mother of one's spouse) are a mainstay of comedy. The humour is based on the premise that the average
mother-in-law
A parent-in-law is a person who has a legal affinity with another by being the parent of the other's spouse. Many cultures and legal systems impose duties and responsibilities on persons connected by this relationship. A person is a child-in-la ...
often considers her
son-in-law
Son-in-Law (22 April 1911 – 15 May 1941) was a British Thoroughbred racehorse and an influential sire, especially for sport horses.
The National Horseracing Museum says Son-in-Law is "probably the best and most distinguished stayer this co ...
to be unsuitable for her daughter (or daughter-in-law unsuitable for her son), and usually includes the stereotype that mothers-in-law are generally overbearing, obnoxious, or unattractive.
This has commonly been referred to as the "battle."
British comedians such as
Les Dawson
Leslie Dawson Jr. (2 February 1931 – 10 June 1993) was an English comedian, actor, writer, and presenter, who is best remembered for his deadpan style, curmudgeonly persona and Mother-in-law joke, jokes about his mother-in-law and wife.
Earl ...
and
Jim Davidson
James Cameron Davidson (born 13 December 1953) is an English stand-up comedian, actor, singer and TV presenter. He hosted the television shows '' Big Break'' and ''The Generation Game''. He also developed two adult pantomime shows such as ''B ...
have often used them, and many television
sitcoms
A sitcom, a portmanteau of situation comedy, or situational comedy, is a genre of comedy centered on a fixed set of characters who mostly carry over from episode to episode. Sitcoms can be contrasted with sketch comedy, where a troupe may use new ...
have featured stereotypical mothers-in-law.
There is evidence that this joke dates back to
Roman
Roman or Romans most often refers to:
*Rome, the capital city of Italy
*Ancient Rome, Roman civilization from 8th century BC to 5th century AD
*Roman people, the people of ancient Rome
*''Epistle to the Romans'', shortened to ''Romans'', a letter ...
times: ''
Satire VI
Satire VI is the most famous of the sixteen '' Satires'' by the Roman author Juvenal written in the late 1st or early 2nd century. In English translation, this satire is often titled something in the vein of ''Against Women'' due to the most obvi ...
'' by
Juvenal
Decimus Junius Juvenalis (), known in English as Juvenal ( ), was a Roman poet active in the late first and early second century CE. He is the author of the collection of satirical poems known as the ''Satires''. The details of Juvenal's life ...
says that one cannot be happy while one's mother-in-law is still alive.
Most of the mother-in-law jokes are easily translatable to other languages and are easily understandable in most
Europe
Europe is a large peninsula conventionally considered a continent in its own right because of its great physical size and the weight of its history and traditions. Europe is also considered a Continent#Subcontinents, subcontinent of Eurasia ...
an cultures.
In a book on
cartooning
A cartoonist is a visual artist who specializes in both drawing and writing cartoons (individual images) or comics (sequential images). Cartoonists differ from comics writers or comic book illustrators in that they produce both the literary and ...
written by
Dave Breger
Irving David Breger (April 15, 1908 – January 16, 1970) was an American cartoonist who created the syndicated ''Mister Breger'' (1945–1970), a gag panel series and Sunday comic strip known earlier as ''Private Breger'' and '' G.I. Joe''. The ...
, the author lists a series of "tired gags", and gives a suggestion on how to exploit them. In his illustration, Breger and his wife go to a
museum
A museum ( ; plural museums or, rarely, musea) is a building or institution that cares for and displays a collection of artifacts and other objects of artistic, cultural, historical, or scientific importance. Many public museums make these ...
and see a ''
Tyrannosaurus
''Tyrannosaurus'' is a genus of large theropoda, theropod dinosaur. The species ''Tyrannosaurus rex'' (''rex'' meaning "king" in Latin), often called ''T. rex'' or colloquially ''T-Rex'', is one of the best represented theropods. ''Tyrannosa ...
''
skeleton
A skeleton is the structural frame that supports the body of an animal. There are several types of skeletons, including the exoskeleton, which is the stable outer shell of an organism, the endoskeleton, which forms the support structure inside ...
. Mrs. Breger says, "And no funny remarks, please, about that Mother called or something..."
A study of mothers-in-law by Pamela Cotterill found that "they tended not to be upset by jokes because they seemed so far fetched they couldn't apply to them, but they didn't find them funny". Cotterill also found that daughters-in-law didn't find them funny either, largely because they saw that one day the jokes could be applied to them.
[Luisa Dillner: Mothers-in-law are lovely, in their place. Their own place, that is - Commentators - Voices - The Independent](_blank)
/ref>
The jokes are considered offensive by some. A widely reported case is that of the London
London is the capital and largest city of England and the United Kingdom, with a population of just under 9 million. It stands on the River Thames in south-east England at the head of a estuary down to the North Sea, and has been a majo ...
borough where, in 2010, a workshop leaflet called "Cultural Awareness: General Problems" advised against using them. The leaflet states that "mother-in-law jokes, as well as offensively sexist in their own right, can also be seen as offensive on the grounds that they disrespect elders or parents."Council outlaws mother-in-law jokes - Telegraph
/ref>
Portrayals
The stereotype is often portrayed on film and in popular entertainment. Some examples include:
*Viola Fields (Jane Fonda
Jane Seymour Fonda (born December 21, 1937) is an American actress, activist, and former fashion model. Recognized as a film icon, Fonda is the recipient of various accolades including two Academy Awards, two British Academy Film Awards, sev ...
) in the film ''Monster-in-Law
''Monster-in-Law'' is a 2005 romantic comedy film directed by Robert Luketic, written by Anya Kochoff and starring Jennifer Lopez, Jane Fonda, Michael Vartan and Wanda Sykes. It marked a return to cinema for Fonda, being her first film in 15 year ...
''.
*Marie Barone
This is a list of fictional characters from ''Everybody Loves Raymond'', an American sitcom, originally broadcast on CBS from September 13, 1996, to May 16, 2005.
The show revolves around the life of Italian-American Ray Barone, a sportswriter ...
(Doris Roberts
Doris May Roberts ( Green; November 4, 1925 – April 17, 2016) was an American actress whose career spanned seven decades of television and film. She received five Emmy Awards and a Screen Actors Guild award during her acting career, which bega ...
) in the sitcom ''Everybody Loves Raymond
''Everybody Loves Raymond'' is an American sitcom television series created by Philip Rosenthal that aired on CBS from September 13, 1996, to May 16, 2005, with a total of 210 episodes spanning nine seasons. It was produced by Where's Lunch and ...
'', who is extremely meddlesome and incessantly makes conceited remarks to her daughter-in-law Debra.
*Adele Delfino (Celia Weston
Celia Weston is an American character actress. Weston received an Independent Spirit Award nomination for her performance in '' Dead Man Walking'' (1995), and also had supporting roles in more than 40 movies, including ''The Talented Mr. Ripley' ...
) on the television series ''Desperate Housewives
''Desperate Housewives'' is an American comedy-drama soap opera television series created by Marc Cherry and produced by ABC Studios and Marc Cherry, Cherry Productions. It aired for eight seasons on American Broadcasting Company, ABC from Octobe ...
''.
* Endora (Agnes Moorehead
Agnes Robertson Moorehead (December 6, 1900April 30, 1974) was an American actress. In a career spanning four decades, her credits included work in radio, stage, film, and television.Obituary ''Variety'', May 8, 1974, page 286. Moorehead was th ...
) in the sitcom ''Bewitched
''Bewitched'' is an American fantasy sitcom television series that originally aired for eight seasons on ABC from September 17, 1964, to March 25, 1972. It is about a witch who marries an ordinary mortal man and vows to lead the life of a typic ...
'' is a witch who is not happy with the decision of her daughter to marry a normal human, and often uses her magic to cause trouble for him.
*Norma Speakman ( Liz Smith) in the sitcom ''The Royle Family
''The Royle Family'' is a British sitcom produced by Granada Television for the BBC, which ran for three series from 1998 to 2000, and specials from 2006 to 2012. It centres on the lives of a television-fixated Manchester family, the Royles, com ...
'', who enjoys baiting son-in-law Jim.
*Olivia Jefferson
The television series ''The Jeffersons'' featured several supporting characters. An incomplete list of these characters appears below.
Willis family Helen Willis
Helen Willis ( née Douglas) (portrayed by Roxie Roker, except for her first appeara ...
(Zara Cully
Zara Frances Cully (January 26, 1892 – February 28, 1978) was an American actress. Cully was best known for her role as Olivia 'Mother Jefferson' Jefferson on the CBS sitcom ''The Jeffersons'', which she portrayed from the series beginning in ...
) in the sitcom ''The Jeffersons
''The Jeffersons'' is an American sitcom television series that was broadcast on CBS from January 18, 1975, to July 2, 1985, lasting 11 seasons and a total of List of The Jeffersons episodes, 253 episodes. ''The Jeffersons'' is one of the longe ...
'' often puts down her daughter-in-law Louise.
*Mrs. Marcus (Ethel Merman
Ethel Merman (born Ethel Agnes Zimmermann, January 16, 1908 – February 15, 1984) was an American actress and singer, known for her distinctive, powerful voice, and for leading roles in musical theatre.Obituary ''Variety'', February 22, 1984. ...
) in the film ''It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World
''It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World'' is a 1963 American comedy film produced and directed by Stanley Kramer with a story and screenplay by William Rose and Tania Rose. The film, starring Spencer Tracy with an all-star cast of comedians, is a ...
'' frequently berates her son-in-law, Russell Finch (Milton Berle
Milton Berle (born Mendel Berlinger; ; July 12, 1908 – March 27, 2002) was an American actor and comedian. His career as an entertainer spanned over 80 years, first in silent films and on stage as a child actor, then in radio, movies and tel ...
), complains almost constantly, and annoys most of the other characters in the film.
*Mrs. Gibson (Ethel Owen
Ethel Owen ( Ethel Marguerite Waite; March 30, 1893 – February 16, 1997) was an American actress with a lengthy career on stage as well as radio and television. In her early sixties, during the mid-1950s, she had a memorable recurring TV rol ...
) in various episodes of the TV show ''The Honeymooners
''The Honeymooners'' is an American television sitcom which originally aired from 1955 to 1956, created by and starring Jackie Gleason, and based on a recurring comedy sketch of the same name that had been part of Gleason's variety show. It fol ...
'' frequently insults her son-in-law Ralph by making jokes about his weight, telling Alice about other men who have courted her before she married Ralph in front of him and saying things that make him mad enough that he shouts at her to get out of the house.
*Pearl Slaghoople
''The Flintstones'' is an American animated sitcom produced by Hanna-Barbera Productions. The series takes place in a romanticized Stone Age setting and follows the activities of the titular family, the Flintstones, and their next-door neighbo ...
in the animated series ''The Flintstones
''The Flintstones'' is an American animated sitcom produced by Hanna-Barbera Productions. The series takes place in a romanticized Stone Age setting and follows the activities of the titular family, the Flintstones, and their next-door neighb ...
'' often ponders why her daughter Wilma had to marry Fred Flintstone
Fred Flintstone is the main character of the animated sitcom '' The Flintstones'', which aired during prime-time on ABC during the original series' run from 1960 to 1966. Fred is the husband of Wilma Flintstone and father of Pebbles Flintsto ...
.
*Madge Harvey (Sheila Reid
Sheila Reid (born 21 December 1937) is a Scottish actress, known for playing Madge Harvey in the ITV sitcom ''Benidorm'' (2007–2016). An original member of the Royal National Theatre in 1963, she played Bianca in the National's 1965 film ve ...
) in the sitcom ''Benidorm
Benidorm is a town and municipality in the province of Alicante, Valencia, on the Mediterranean coast of Spain.
Benidorm has been a tourist destination within Spain since 1925, when its port was extended and the first hotels were built, though ...
'' frequently irritates her son-in-law Mick.
Other
The plant ''Dracaena trifasciata
''Dracaena trifasciata'' is a species of flowering plant in the family Asparagaceae, native to tropical West Africa from Nigeria east to the Congo. It is most commonly known as the snake plant, Saint George's sword, mother-in-law's tongue, and ...
'' is sometimes referred to as "mother-in-law's tongue".
See also
* Maternal insult
A maternal insult, also referred to as a "yo mama" joke, is a reference to a person's mother through the use of phrases such as "your mother" or other regional variants, frequently used to insult the target by way of their mother. Used as an in ...
* "Mother-in-Law (song)
"Mother-in-Law" is a 1961 song recorded by Ernie K-Doe. It was a number-one hit in the U.S. on both the ''Billboard'' Hot 100 chart and the ''Billboard'' R&B chart. The song was written and produced by Allen Toussaint, who also played the pia ...
", a 1961 song written by Allen Toussaint
Allen Richard Toussaint (; January 14, 1938 – November 10, 2015) was an American musician, songwriter, arranger and record producer. He was an influential figure in New Orleans rhythm and blues from the 1950s to the end of the century, descri ...
and performed by Ernie K-Doe
Ernest Kador Jr. (February 22, 1933 – July 5, 2001), known by the stage name Ernie K-Doe, was an American rhythm-and-blues singer best known for his 1961 hit single "Mother-in-Law", which went to number 1 on the ''Billboard'' pop chart in the U ...
References
{{Reflist
External links
Mother in Law Support and Stories Collection
Mother-In-Law Stories, Jokes and Support
Joke cycles
Stereotypes of women
Affinity (law)