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Manis Friedman (full name: Menachem Manis HaKohen Friedman, he, מנחם מניס הכהן פרידמן; born 1946) is a
Hassid Ḥasīd ( he, חסיד, "pious", "saintly", "godly man"; plural "Hasidim") is a Jewish honorific, frequently used as a term of exceptional respect in the Talmudic and early medieval periods. It denotes a person who is scrupulous in his observ ...
, rabbi, author, social philosopher and public speaker. He is also the dean of the Bais Chana Institute of Jewish Studies. Friedman authored '' Doesn't Anyone Blush Anymore?'', which was published in 1990 and is currently in its fourth printing. He is featured in the documentary films: ''The Lost Key'' (2014), ''The Jewish Journey: America'' (2015), and "
Patterns of Evidence ''Patterns of Evidence'' is a film series directed by Tim Mahoney and part of the independent Christian film industry. The films advocate for Mahoney's views on biblical chronology, which he contrasts with mainstream scholarly opinion. ''Patter ...
s" (2017).


Biography

Born in Prague, Czechoslovakia in 1946, Friedman immigrated with his family to the United States in 1951. He received his rabbinic ordination at the Rabbinical College of Canada in 1969.


Activities

In 1971, inspired by the teachings of the
Lubavitcher Rebbe Chabad, also known as Lubavitch, Habad and Chabad-Lubavitch (), is an Orthodox Jewish Hasidic dynasty. Chabad is one of the world's best-known Hasidic movements, particularly for its outreach activities. It is one of the largest Hasidic groups ...
, Friedman as a Shliach ("emissary") cofounded the
Bais Chana Women International Bais Chana Women International is a Chabad non-profit organization that works to provide an environment for Jewish girls and women, ages 15 and up and from all backgrounds, to explore Jewish teachings and traditions. Bais Chana's founding was ins ...
, an Institute for Jewish Studies in
Minnesota Minnesota () is a state in the upper midwestern region of the United States. It is the 12th largest U.S. state in area and the 22nd most populous, with over 5.75 million residents. Minnesota is home to western prairies, now given over to ...
for women with little or no formal Jewish education. He has served as the school's dean since its inception. From 1984 to 1990, he served as the simultaneous translator for a series of televised talks by the Lubavitcher
Rebbe A Rebbe ( yi, רבי, translit=rebe) or Admor ( he, אדמו״ר) is the spiritual leader in the Hasidic movement, and the personalities of its dynasties.Heilman, Samuel"The Rebbe and the Resurgence of Orthodox Judaism."''Religion and Spiritua ...
. Friedman briefly served as senior translator for Jewish Educational Media, Inc. Friedman has lectured in cities throughout the US, as well as London, Hong Kong, Cape Town, and Johannesburg in South Africa, Melbourne and Sydney in Australia, and a number of South and Central American cities. In the wake of the natural disasters in 2004 and 2005, Friedman authored a practical guide to help rescue and relief workers properly understand and deal with the needs of Jewish survivors. Friedman is the most popular rabbi on YouTube, with over 236,000 subscribers as of January 2023.


Family

Manis Friedman is a
Kohen Kohen ( he, , ''kōhēn'', , "priest", pl. , ''kōhănīm'', , "priests") is the Hebrew word for "priest", used in reference to the Aaronic priesthood, also called Aaronites or Aaronides. Levitical priests or ''kohanim'' are traditionally b ...
. He is the brother of the Jewish singer
Avraham Fried Avraham Shabsi Hakohen Friedman ( he, אברהם שבתי הכהן פרידמן, born March 22, 1959) better known by his stage name, Avraham Fried, is a popular musical entertainer in the Orthodox Jewish community. Career Fried was encouraged ...
and father of
contemporary Jewish religious music For the purposes of this article, “contemporary” refers to the period from 1967 ( Israel's Six-Day War) to the present day, “Jewish” refers to the various streams and traits of Judaism practiced. Many Orthodox Jews use the term “relig ...
vocalist
Benny Friedman Benjamin Friedman (March 18, 1905 – November 24, 1982) was an American football player and coach, and athletic administrator. A native of Cleveland, Ohio, Friedman played college football as a halfback and quarterback for the University of ...
.


Teachings

Though not extensively published in book form, Friedman's teachings have been cited by many authors writing on various secular issues as well as on exclusively Jewish topics. Friedman has been quoted in: *
Shmuley Boteach Jacob Shmuel Boteach ( ; born November 19, 1966) is an American Orthodox Jewish rabbi, author, and television host. Boteach is the author of 31 books, including the best seller ''Kosher Sex: A Recipe for Passion and Intimacy'', and ''Kosher Jesu ...
, ''The Private Adam'' (2005) and ''Dating Secrets of the Ten Commandments'' (2001) *Barbara Becker Holstein, ''Enchanted Self: A Positive Therapy'' (1997) *Angela Payne, ''Living Every Single Moment: Embrace Your Purpose Now'' (2004) *Sylvia Barack Fishman, ''A Breath of Life: Feminism in the American Jewish Community'' (1995) In their autobiographies, ''Playing with Fire: One Woman's Remarkable Odyssey'' by Tova Mordechai (1991) and ''Shanda: The Making and Breaking of a Self-Loathing Jew'' by Neal Karlen (2004), the authors ascribe Friedman a role in their increasing religiosity.


Views on love, marriage and femininity


Two types of love

According to Friedman, the love between spouses must overcome the differences between the two parties, generating greater intensity in the relationship. By contrast the love between other family members are predicated upon the commonness the two parties share. Friedman further states that husband and wife, male and female, in essence always remain strangers; for this reason the acquired love in the relationship is never entirely consistent.


Fidelity

On fidelity in marriage, Friedman is quoted stating "If you help yourself to the benefits of being married when you are single, you're likely to help yourself to the benefits of being single when you're married."


Femininity

Sociologist
Lynn Davidman Lynn Rita Davidman (born 1955) is an American sociologist. She is the distinguished professor of modern Jewish studies and professor of sociology at the University of Kansas. Early life and education Davidman was born in New York City to a Mode ...
interviewed a number of students studying under Friedman in 1983. She quotes Friedman saying that a woman "violates herself" if she were to refrain from having children and that birth control is a "violent violation of a woman's being". Friedman insisted that the teenage angst experienced by girls stems from the fact that they are already biologically and psychologically ready for marriage but their urges are held back; he believes that, in a perfect world, girls getting married as young as fourteen would be optimal, though that's obviously not realistic in today's society. According to Davidman, Friedman's position on femininity differed entirely from the values of his students.


Controversies


On the Israeli-Arab conflict

Friedman has claimed that the moral way to fight a war is to "Destroy their holy sites. Kill men, women and children (and cattle)," and that if Israel followed this wisdom from the Bible, there would be "no civilian casualties, no children in the line of fire, no false sense of righteousness, in fact, no war." After receiving criticism Friedman clarified that "any neighbor of the Jewish people should be treated, as the Torah commands us, with respect and compassion." Friedman later clarified that when he was quoting from the
Torah The Torah (; hbo, ''Tōrā'', "Instruction", "Teaching" or "Law") is the compilation of the first five books of the Hebrew Bible, namely the books of Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers and Deuteronomy. In that sense, Torah means the s ...
he was not advocating to actually kill anyone, rather if Israel would threaten to do these things, it would scare its enemies and prevent war.


On victims of pedophilia

Friedman was quoted that survivors of child sexual abuse are not as deeply damaged as some claim and should learn to overcome their traumatic experiences. Friedman's comments were received poorly by advocates who saw his statements as trivialising the experiences of the victims. Friedman subsequently issued an apology for the offensive remarks.


On victims of the holocaust

According to the ''Australian Jewish News'', Friedman, in a speech in the 1980s, framed the holocaust as part of a divine plan. Friedman reportedly stated “Who in fact died and who remained alive had nothing to do with the Nazis,” and “not a single Jewish child died because of the Nazis … they died in their relationship with God.” According to the paper, Friedman's statements were not well received by local holocaust survivors.


Published works

* Doesn't Anyone Blush Anymore? Reclaiming Modesty, Intimacy and Sexuality * The Relief and Rescue Workers Guide to Judaism - a Rescue Workers Handbook * The Joy of Intimacy: A Soulful Guide to Love, Sexuality & Marriage


See also

*
Simon Jacobson Simon Jacobson (born December 8, 1956) is the author of '' Toward a Meaningful Life'' (William Morrow, 2002), founder of The Meaningful Life Center and publisher of the Yiddish English weekly, The ''Algemeiner Journal''. Jacobson is a member of ...
*
Tzvi Freeman Tzvi Freeman is a Canadian rabbi and author associated with the Chabad-Lubavitch Hasidic movement. Freeman is known for his work as a writer and editor for Chabad.org, and is notable for his work on the topics of Jewish mysticism and Jewish medit ...


References


External links

*
A collection of articles and audio classes by Rabbi Manis Friedman

Ongoing series of lectures in video and audio formOfficial YouTube Channel
{{DEFAULTSORT:Friedman, Manis 1946 births Living people 21st-century American rabbis Jewish biblical scholars American Hasidic rabbis American people of Czech-Jewish descent Chabad-Lubavitch (Hasidic dynasty) Czechoslovak emigrants to the United States 20th-century Jewish biblical scholars 21st-century Jewish biblical scholars Hasidic writers