Kindness

Kindness is a type of behavior marked by acts of generosity, consideration, rendering assistant or concern for others, without expecting praise or reward in return.

Kindness is a topic of interest in philosophy, religion, and psychology. Kindness was one of the main topics in the Bible. In Book II of "Rhetoric", Aristotle defines kindness as "helpfulness towards someone in need, not in return for anything, nor for the advantage of the helper himself, but for that of the person helped". Nietzsche considered kindness and love to be the "most curative herbs and agents in human intercourse". Kindness is considered to be one of the Knightly Virtues. In Meher Baba's teachings, God is synonymous with kindness: "God is so kind that it is impossible to imagine His unbounded kindness!"

History

In English, the word ''kindness'' is from approximately 1300, though the word's sense evolved to its current meanings in the late 1300s.

Over time, it has acted in part of a personality trait as a long tradition of generosity through human cultures and family-friendly benefits in the concept of hospitality.

In society

In human mating choice, studies suggest that both men and women value kindness in their prospective mates, along with intelligence, physical appearance, attractiveness and age.

Nice guy

A "nice guy" is an informal and usually stereotypical term for an (often young) adult male who portrays himself as gentle, compassionate, sensitive, and/or vulnerable. The term is used both positively and negatively. When used positively, and particularly when used as a preference or description by someone else, it is intended to imply a male who puts the needs of others before his own, avoids confrontations, does favors, gives emotional support, tries to stay out of trouble, and generally acts nicely towards others. In the context of a relationship, it may also refer to traits of honesty, loyalty, romanticism, courtesy, and respect. When used negatively, a nice guy implies a male who is unassertive, does not express his true feelings and, in the context of dating (in which the term is often used), uses acts of ostensible friendship with the unstated aim of progressing to a romantic or sexual relationship.

In psychology

Based on experiments at Yale University using games with babies, some studies concluded that kindness is inherent to human beings. There are similar studies about the root of empathy in infancy – motor mirroring developing in the early months of life, to lead (optimally) to the concern shown by children for their peers in distress.

Barbara Taylor and Adam Phillips have stressed the element of necessary realism in adult kindness, as well as the way "real kindness changes people in the doing of it, often in unpredictable ways".

In literature

* The ''Tirukkural,'' an ancient Indian work on ethics and morality, dedicates a chapter to kindness (chapter 8, verses 71–80), furthering the value in other chapters, such as hospitality (verses 81–90), uttering pleasant words (verses 91–100), compassion (verses 241–250), moral vegetarianism (verses 251–260), non-violence (verses 311–320), non-killing (verses 321–330), and benignity (verses 571–580), among others.
* Mark Twain from a compassion point of view considered "Kindness s alanguage which the deaf can hear and the blind can see."
* It has been suggested that "most of Shakespeare's opus could be considered a study of human kindness".
* Robert Louis Stevenson considered that 'the essence of love is kindness; and indeed it may best be defined as passionate kindness: kindness, so to speak, run mad and become importunate and violent'.
* The Christian apostle Paul lists kindness as one of the nine traits considered to be the " fruit of the Spirit" in Galatians 5:22. In 1 Corinthians 13:4 he states, "Love is patient, love is kind."

In media

The motion picture ''Pay it Forward'', based on the novel of the same name written in 1999 by the founder Catherine Ryan Hyde, which starred Kevin Spacey, Helen Hunt, Haley Joel Osment and Jon Bon Jovi, illustrates the power one person can have to make an impact on a chain reaction of kind deeds. The philosophy of ''Pay It Forward'' is that through acts of kindness among strangers, we all foster a more caring society. In the book and film, Reuben St. Clair, a social studies teacher in Atascadero, California, challenges his students to "change the world". One of his students, Trevor, takes the challenge to heart. He starts by showing kindness to a stranger which ripples further than he could have ever imagined.

In October 2011, Life Vest Inside posted a video called "Kindness Boomerang".Archived a
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It shows how one act of kindness passes seamlessly from one person to the next and boomerangs back to the person who set it into motion. Orly Wahba, Life Vest Inside Founder and Director of Kindness Boomerang explains that each scene was based on real-life experiences she personally went through; moments of kindness that left a lasting impression on her life. Within several months after its release, Kindness Boomerang went viral; reaching over 20 million people globally and eventually invadingWahba spot on TED2013 stage to speak about the power of kindness.

Singer-songwriter Harry Styles has been promoting kindness since at least 2017 with his slogan 'Treat People with Kindness', also abbreviated to 'TPWK'.

Teaching Kindness

Kindness is most often taught from parents to children and is learned through observation and some direct teaching. Studies have shown that through programs and interventions kindness can be taught and encouraged during the first 20 years of life. Further studies show that kindness interventions can help improve wellbeing with comparable results as teaching gratitude. Similar findings have shown that organizational level teaching of kindness can improve wellbeing of adults in college. Kindness is not present as a course in most institutions. Numerous religions teach their members to be kind and religiosity is associated with greater wellbeing and longevity.

Self-kindness

See also: self-compassion

Self-kindness means to act in a generous and considerate manner when one is going through pain, struggles, or hardships as opposed to ignoring them or being self-criticizing. This is different from self-esteem, which is more of an evaluation of oneself, whereas self-kindness is more about how one treats themselves. Self-kindness, as with other forms of kindness, is shown to improve well-being and longevity. What is theorized by David Snowden is that the ability to return to a positive affect when going through a negative life event or stress is what allows a person to be healthier and happier. It is about acknowledging the hardships and struggles in life and realizing that there is still room to grow and learn while experiencing these things. Also, kindness starts with being kind to yourself. Have you ever noticed how much better you treat others when you are good to yourself? Usually, we go through life, by going to work, answering emails, eating dinner, and more. But we forget to take a moment to breathe, assess what we need, and work for that. For example, sleep, or a relaxed meal. We need to be kind to ourselves when we misstep, which happens to everybody. Sometimes, we make other people the target of our own anger and frustration, what we really feel about ourselves we take it out on them. Should we keep doing that? For how long? I think it's time we all need to start loving ourselves more.

See also

References

Further reading

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Forget Survival of the Fittest: It Is Kindness That Counts
(January 2017), ''Scientific American.'' "A psychologist probes how altruism, Darwinism, and neurobiology mean that we can succeed by not being cutthroat."

External links

*

Australian Kindness Movement

A UK independent, not-for-profit organisation

Random Acts of Kindness Foundation

Video with quotes about Kindness
from Wikiquote

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Giving
Virtue
Ethics
Seven virtues
Fruit of the Holy Spirit
Emotions
Moral psychology