A homewrecker (sometimes styled as home wrecker or home-wrecker) is a person, object or activity that causes or comes close to causing the breakup of a

marriage Marriage, also called matrimony or wedlock, is a culturally and often legally recognized union between people called spouses. It establishes rights and obligations between them, as well as between them and their children, and between ...

(or similar partnership). The homewrecker is said to have taken one of the spouses away from the marriage, thus "wrecking" the marital home. Most commonly, the label "homewrecker" is applied to a person having an

affair An affair is a sexual relationship, romantic friendship, or passionate attachment in which at least one of its participants has a formal or informal commitment to a third person who may neither agree to such relationship nor even be aware of i ...

with someone else's spouse or

domestic partner A domestic partnership is a legal relationship, usually between couples, who live together and share a common domestic life, but are not married (to each other or to anyone else). People in domestic partnerships receive benefits that guarantee ...

; it can also refer to other forces that are destructive to a marital relationship and tied only to one party to that relationship.

Infidelity

When "homewrecker" is used to describe a person, it is applied to someone who breaks up a pre-existing relationship by having an affair with one of its partners. It may be applied more often when the person actually intends to cause the break-up in order to replace the prior partner permanently. Homewrecking is not used exclusively to describe the break-up of marriages; it is also used in connection with other long-term relationships that resemble marriage, especially where there are children or joint property.

Non-affair homewreckers

Less frequently, other intense and/or time-consuming pursuits of a partner lead to broken relationships and are labeled "homewreckers";

alcoholism Alcoholism is, broadly, any drinking of alcohol (drug), alcohol that results in significant Mental health, mental or physical health problems. Because there is disagreement on the definition of the word ''alcoholism'', it is not a recognize ...

, for example, has long been identified as a homewrecker. More common examples are

drug addiction Addiction is a neuropsychological disorder characterized by a persistent and intense urge to engage in certain behaviors, one of which is the usage of a drug, despite substantial harm and other negative consequences. Repetitive drug use of ...

gambling addiction Problem gambling or ludomania is repetitive gambling behavior despite harm and negative consequences. Problem gambling may be diagnosed as a mental disorder according to ''DSM-5'' if certain diagnostic criteria are met. Pathological gambling is ...

domestic violence Domestic violence (also known as domestic abuse or family violence) is violence or other abuse that occurs in a domestic setting, such as in a marriage or cohabitation. ''Domestic violence'' is often used as a synonym for ''intimate partner ...

, e.g.

child abuse Child abuse (also called child endangerment or child maltreatment) is physical, sexual, and/or psychological maltreatment or neglect of a child or children, especially by a parent or a caregiver. Child abuse may include any act or failure to a ...

and controlling

personality Personality is the characteristic sets of behaviors, cognitions, and emotional patterns that are formed from biological and environmental factors, and which change over time. While there is no generally agreed-upon definition of personality, mos ...

. Other common targets for homewrecker labeling are intense pursuit of a career, devotion to a

hobby A hobby is considered to be a regular activity that is done for enjoyment, typically during one's leisure time. Hobbies include collecting themed items and objects, engaging in creative and artistic pursuits, playing Sport, sports, or pursu ...

, or running a business. The time commitment to these and similar activities can rend normal home life asunder and earn the name "homewrecker". Immersive Internet-based social applications and

pornography Pornography (often shortened to porn or porno) is the portrayal of sexual subject matter for the exclusive purpose of sexual arousal. Primarily intended for adults,

are also becoming more commonly labelled as homewreckers, especially when they share the social and sexual aspects of having an affair. Family members can act as homewreckers by alienating one partner, identifying weaknesses in one partner, and/or exacerbating minor disagreements into major issues.

Disputed labeling

Usage is disputed in situations where the relationship was in trouble even without the affair. For example, in a faltering marriage, an estranged husband may have an affair, and the wife may blame the alleged homewrecker for the breakup of the marriage, even though the affair itself was partly the result of stresses that pre-dated it. Nevertheless, even in such cases, the affair can be a major additional stressor and make the relationship unsalvageable. Others suggest that affairs should never create an impression of homewrecking since it is unhealthy relationships that lead to affairs and that any fault for an affair should be laid more at the feet of the

cheating Cheating generally describes various actions designed to subvert rules in order to obtain unfair advantages. This includes acts of bribery, cronyism and nepotism in any situation where individuals are given preference using inappropriate cr ...

partner than at the third party.

Other uses

Arts

Homewrecker is frequently used in the title of works in the performing arts, including songs, record albums, movies, television series and episodes of television series. ''See'' Homewrecker (disambiguation).

Cocktails

There are several different

cocktail A cocktail is an alcoholic mixed drink. Most commonly, cocktails are either a combination of spirits, or one or more spirits mixed with other ingredients such as tonic water, fruit juice, flavored syrup, or cream. Cocktails vary widely across ...

s called "Homewrecker." As with many named alcoholic drinks, there is an element of hyperbole in this name; it may relate to the common application of term to alcoholism as a marriage stressor, as described above. The recipes for several different variations of "Homewrecker" cocktails include: * 2 oz melon liqueur, 2 oz tequila, 2 oz cranberry juice, 1 oz Jägermeister, * 1/2 oz. Malibu Rum, 1/2 oz. Peach Schnapps, 1/2 oz. Vodka, Orange Juice, Strawberry Daiquiri Mix, or * 1 1/2 oz Old Overholt Rye, 1/2 oz Punt e Mes, 1/2 oz St. Germain, 1/2 oz Lemon Juice (from 1940)

Anti-social behavior

Scientific American ''Scientific American'', informally abbreviated ''SciAm'' or sometimes ''SA'', is an American popular science magazine. Many famous scientists, including Albert Einstein and Nikola Tesla, have contributed articles to it. In print since 1845, it i ...

, tongue-in-cheek, referred to

oxytocin Oxytocin (Oxt or OT) is a peptide hormone and neuropeptide normally produced in the hypothalamus and released by the posterior pituitary. It plays a role in social bonding, reproduction, childbirth, and the period after childbirth. Oxytocin ...

as a homewrecker. The hormone normally triggers a nesting instinct, which makes it a "home builder", not a homewrecker. But with chronic exposure in prairie voles, a study instead showed a breakdown of the normal nesting instincts: The animals avoided pair bonding and pup nurturing. This raises questions about the growing practice of using oxytocin to treat behavior disorders such as autism.

References

{{Reflist , 2 , refs= {{cite journal, last=Gary, first=Stix, title=When the Cuddle Hormone Is a Home Wrecker, journal=Scientific American, date=October 16, 2012, series=Talking Back blog, url=http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/talking-back/2012/10/16/when-the-cuddle-hormone-is-a-home-wrecker/, access-date=19 August 2013, archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20130605092134/http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/talking-back/2012/10/16/when-the-cuddle-hormone-is-a-home-wrecker/, archive-date=2013-06-05, url-status=dead {{cite journal, last=Hupka, first=Ralph B., author2=Bram Buunk , author3=Gábor Falus , author4=Ante Fulgosi , author5=Elsa Ortega , author6=Ronny Swain , author7=Nadia Tarabrina , title=Romantic Jealousy and Romantic Envy: A Seven-Nation Study, journal=Journal of Cross-Cultural Psychology, year=1985, volume=16, doi=10.1177/0022002185016004002 , pages=423–446, s2cid=145376600 {{cite journal, last=Bales, first=Karen, author2=Allison Perkeybile, title=When Too Much of a Good Thing is Bad: Chronic Oxytocin, Development, and Social Impairments, journal=Biological Psychiatry, date=August 2013, volume=74, issue=3, pages=160–161, url=http://www.biologicalpsychiatryjournal.com/article/S0006-3223(13)00458-7/fulltext, access-date=19 August 2013, doi=10.1016/j.biopsych.2013.05.015, pmid=23845581, s2cid=46098342 {{cite journal, last=Towns, first=Charles B., title=Drug Addictions and Alcoholism, journal=Medical Review of Reviews, year=1916, volume=22, page=523 {{cite web, last=Forleo, first=Marie, title=Is Your Business a Homewrecker? Three Steps To Save Your Marriagex, url=http://www.marieforleo.com/2013/07/homewrecker-business/, access-date=18 August 2013 Love Mating Divorce Marriage Casual sex Sexual fidelity Intimate relationships