"Frenemy" (also spelled "frienemy") is an
oxymoron and a
portmanteau
A portmanteau word, or portmanteau (, ) is a blend of words[friend
Friendship is a relationship of mutual affection between people. It is a stronger form of interpersonal bond than an "acquaintance" or an "association", such as a classmate, neighbor, coworker, or colleague.
In some cultures, the concept of ...](_blank)
" and "
enemy
An enemy or a foe is an individual or a group that is considered as forcefully adverse or threatening. The concept of an enemy has been observed to be "basic for both individuals and communities". The term "enemy" serves the social function of d ...
" that refers to "a person with whom one is friendly, despite a fundamental dislike or rivalry" or "a person who combines the characteristics of a friend and an enemy". The term is used to describe personal, geopolitical and commercial relationships both among individuals and groups or institutions. This term also describes a competitive friendship.
History
"Frenemy" appeared in print as early as 1953 in an article titled "Howz about calling the Russians our Frienemies?" by the American gossip columnist
Walter Winchell
Walter Winchell (April 7, 1897 – February 20, 1972) was a syndicated American newspaper gossip columnist and radio news commentator. Originally a vaudeville performer, Winchell began his newspaper career as a Broadway reporter, critic and co ...
in the ''
Nevada State Journal
The ''Reno Gazette Journal'' is the main daily newspaper for Reno, Nevada. It is owned and operated by the Gannett Company. It came into being when the ''Nevada State Journal'' (founded on November 23, 1870) and the ''Reno Evening Gazette'' (foun ...
''.
The American-based author and activist
Jessica Mitford claimed in 1977 that the word was coined by one of her sisters: "... an incredibly useful word…coined by one of my sisters when she was a small child to describe a rather dull little girl who lived near us. My sister and the frenemy played together constantly…all the time disliking each other heartily."
From the mid-1990s it underwent a massive increase in usage.
People
A ''
Businessweek
''Bloomberg Businessweek'', previously known as ''BusinessWeek'', is an American weekly business magazine published fifty times a year. Since 2009, the magazine is owned by New York City-based Bloomberg L.P. The magazine debuted in New York City ...
'' article stated that frenemies in the workplace are common, even in business to business partnerships. Due to increasingly informal environments and the "abundance of very close, intertwined
relationships that bridge people's professional and personal lives ...
hile
Hile ( ne, हिले) is a hill town located in the Eastern Part of Nepal, 13 km north of the regional center of Dhankuta Bazar. At an elevation of 1948 meters, it is the main route to other hilly districts like Bhojpur and Sankhuwasab ...
it certainly wasn't unheard of for people to socialize with colleagues in the past, the sheer amount of time that people spend at work now has left a lot of people with less time and inclination to develop friendships outside of the office."
Professional relationships are successful when two or more business partners come together and benefit from one another, but personal relationships require more common interests outside of business. Relationships in the workplace, in a sports club, or any place that involves performance comparing, form because of the commonalities between persons. Due to the intense environment, competitiveness can evolve into envy and strain a relationship. Frenemy type relationships become routine and common because of the shared interest of business dealings or competition.
Sigmund Freud
Sigmund Freud ( , ; born Sigismund Schlomo Freud; 6 May 1856 – 23 September 1939) was an Austrian neurologist and the founder of psychoanalysis, a clinical method for evaluating and treating pathologies explained as originating in conflicts ...
said of himself that "an intimate friend and a hated enemy have always been indispensable to my emotional life…not infrequently…friend and enemy have coincided in the same person".
Types
Frenemies can be divided into different categories based on their behaviors:
* One-sided frenemy: A person reaches who out or meets another person only when help or a favor is needed can be considered a one-sided frenemy to the latter person, who does not care about the life of the other person and has no interest in what is going on. One also does not show up in time to meet the other's need and so it is a one-sided relationship.
* Unfiltered/Undermining frenemy: This type of frenemy insults, makes fun of, and cracks sarcastic jokes about the friend so frequently that it gets hard to tolerate. Also, secrets are disclosed in public.
* Over-involved frenemy: This kind of frenemy gets involved in the friend's life in ways that the friend might not approve of. They reach out to their family, friends, or significant others in inappropriate ways without their permission to find something out. Their over-involvement often bothers and irritates the friend.
* Competitive work frenemy: This kind of frenemy is a competitor to one person. Since they work in the same place or area, they behave well, make compliments, and act as well-wishers, but in reality, they never want something good to happen to the other. They never want the other to become more successful.
* Ambivalent frenemy: This kind of frenemy has both positive and negative qualities. Sometimes, they can be helpful and polite, but sometimes, they also act in a selfish or competitive way.
* Jealous frenemy: Jealousy can turn friends into frenemies. A person may become jealous of their friends because of their raise, success, beauty, personality, humor, or social status.
* Unsure frenemy: Someone who does not know exactly the status or closeness of their friendship may, for example, not be sure about being liked by the other person, whether are real friends or just business friends, or if they will consider inviting them to family programs.
* Passive-aggressive frenemy: They make mean remarks and give backhand compliments but never directly to the other's face. They can leave a person feeling confused about whether they have done something wrong.
See also
*
Competition
Competition is a rivalry where two or more parties strive for a common goal which cannot be shared: where one's gain is the other's loss (an example of which is a zero-sum game). Competition can arise between entities such as organisms, indiv ...
*
The enemy of my enemy is my friend
"The enemy of my enemy is my friend" is an ancient proverb which suggests that two parties can or should work together against a common enemy. The exact meaning of the modern phrase was first expressed in the Latin phrase "Amicus meus, inimicus ...
*
Promoting adversaries
Promoting adversaries refers to an unofficiated self-organizing tactical relationship between opposing organizations, in which both opposing sides benefit by attacking each other. The relationship typically relies on either side never fully defeat ...
*
Love–hate relationship
A love–hate relationship is an interpersonal relationship involving simultaneous or alternating emotions of love and hate—something particularly common when emotions are intense.
The term is used frequently in psychology, popular writing and ...
References
External links
{{Wiktionary
*
Australian Broadcasting Company
The Australian Broadcasting Company Pty. Ltd. was a company founded in Melbourne in 1924 with a capital of £A 100,000 by a consortium of entertainment interests, notably Farmer & Company, J. C. Williamson Limited and J. & N. Tait to fou ...
br>
Sir Martin Sorrell discusses media changesLA Times: Google an ally, not a threat, media exec says ''
Los Angeles Times
The ''Los Angeles Times'' (abbreviated as ''LA Times'') is a daily newspaper that started publishing in Los Angeles in 1881. Based in the LA-adjacent suburb of El Segundo since 2018, it is the sixth-largest newspaper by circulation in the U ...
''
The Word - Apocalypse Mao: Murdered by the Orient's Success - FrenemyColbert Report
''The Colbert Report'' ( ) is an American late-night talk and news satire television program hosted by Stephen Colbert that aired four days a week on Comedy Central from October 17, 2005, to December 18, 2014, for 1,447 episodes. The show foc ...
1950s neologisms
Interpersonal relationships
Friendship
English words