Cruise Confidential
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''Cruise Confidential'' is the first book in the eponymous series by author Brian David Bruns, published in 2008 by Travelers' Tales (a division of Solas House). Its full title is ''Cruise Confidential: A Hit Below the Waterline: Where the Crew Lives, Eats, Wars, and Parties — One Crazy Year Working on Cruise Ships''. ''Cruise Confidential'' provoked a discussion about the merits of
cruise line A cruise line is a company that operates cruise ships that operate on ocean or rivers and which markets cruises to the public. Cruise lines are distinct from passenger lines which are primarily concerned with transportation of passengers. Though ...
s' exploitation of workers. The book received positive reviews for its humor and for its giving an insider look at the experience of working on cruise ships. It attracted criticism from reviewers for Bruns' focus on repeatedly describing the attractive women he met on the ship. Bruns wrote three sequels to the book: ''Ship for Brains'' (2011), ''Unsinkable Mister Brown'' (2012), and ''High Seas Drifter'' (2014).


Plot summary

''Cruise Confidential'' narrates the experiences of the author working in the cruise industry. As one of the few Americans in
Carnival Cruise Lines Carnival Cruise Line is an international cruise line with headquarters in Doral, Florida. The company is a subsidiary of Carnival Corporation & plc. Its logo is a funnel shaped like a whale's tail, with a red, white, and blue color scheme. This ...
' restaurants, he is unprepared for the realities of working in the cruise industry, with long hours and little pay. He worked seven days a week for 14 to 16 hours per day. He is also subjected to a range of challenges from his international colleagues, many of whom deride his decision to work at sea to be with his girlfriend, Bianca, who is a waitress on the ship ''
Carnival Conquest ''Carnival Conquest'' is a cruise ship owned and operated by Carnival Cruise Line. She is the first of her namesake class, whose design is derived from the ''Destiny''-class of cruise ships. Sixty percent of her staterooms have ocean views, and ...
'' and is from
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,
Romania Romania ( ; ro, România ) is a country located at the crossroads of Central Europe, Central, Eastern Europe, Eastern, and Southeast Europe, Southeastern Europe. It borders Bulgaria to the south, Ukraine to the north, Hungary to the west, S ...
. Bruns describes life in the crew's quarters, called I-95, after the paperwork non-Americans need for American employment. After collaborating to serve the passengers, the crew members who come from numerous countries carouse during the several hours they have left. Brian begins with his entry into ship life on ''
Carnival Fantasy ''Carnival Fantasy'' (formerly ''Fantasy'') was a cruise ship operated by Carnival Cruise Line. She was the first ship of her namesake class, which was the largest by number of ships, before the scrapping of the Fantasy, Inspiration, Imagination, ...
'' as a restaurant trainee, then moves up through the ranks to lower level restaurant manager on ''
Carnival Conquest ''Carnival Conquest'' is a cruise ship owned and operated by Carnival Cruise Line. She is the first of her namesake class, whose design is derived from the ''Destiny''-class of cruise ships. Sixty percent of her staterooms have ocean views, and ...
''. Far from being the result of hard work, he finds he is an unknowing pawn in a game of international politics on board. Several factions attempt to drive him out of his chosen career, feeling an American is disruptive to the foreign-run hierarchy. Others champion him but invariably only in regards to their own careers. His promotion is ultimately denied and he is sent to ''
Carnival Legend ''Carnival Legend'' is a operated by Carnival Cruise Line. Built by Kværner Masa-Yards at its Helsinki New Shipyard in Helsinki, Finland, she was floated out on December 17, 2001, and christened by English actress and author Dame Judi Denc ...
'' as a waiter, embittered but not beaten. He was the first American waiter in 30 years to complete a full contract lasting eight months without quitting. The climax of the book is his effort at finding a different path to remaining at sea when his restaurant career implodes. His experiences as an art auctioneer and his continued quest for his girlfriend are narrated in the sequels. Bruns imparts his opinions about cruising. He requests that passengers give good tips and cruise companies give a
living wage A living wage is defined as the minimum income necessary for a worker to meet their basic needs. This is not the same as a subsistence wage, which refers to a biological minimum, or a solidarity wage, which refers to a minimum wage tracking labor ...
. He tells passengers that their fare does not give them the right to be rude but they should receive quality
customer service Customer service is the assistance and advice provided by a company to those people who buy or use its products or services. Each industry requires different levels of customer service, but in the end, the idea of a well-performed service is that ...
. The book includes a glossary with ship terminology and amount of food needed.


Reception

''
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''s wrote, "Funny and appalling at the same time, this gives an insider's view of what it's like to work on a ship." Noelle Stokes praised the book, writing in the ''
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'', "Any cruise fanatic like me would love this book."
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librarian Jana Atkins, stated, "Some of the stories are cautionary tales of American rudeness, some are heartwarming stories about community and international relations, and others are just R-rated – so beware. This book will change your view of the whole travel industry, even if you never want to take a cruise." ''
The Gazette The Gazette (stylized as the GazettE), formerly known as , is a Japanese visual kei Rock music, rock band, formed in Kanagawa Prefecture, Kanagawa in early 2002.''Shoxx'' Vol 106 June 2007 pg 40-45 The band is currently signed to Sony Music Recor ...
''s Rob Cline wrote, "The book is seldom laugh-out-loud funny, but it is humorous throughout." A common thread in the book is the Bruns' discussion of the numerous people onboard who want to have sex. Bruns emphasizes repeatedly that he found the female passengers and crew to be physically attractive, which Cline found "quite wearying fairly early on". Spud Hilton wrote in the ''
San Francisco Chronicle The ''San Francisco Chronicle'' is a newspaper serving primarily the San Francisco Bay Area of Northern California. It was founded in 1865 as ''The Daily Dramatic Chronicle'' by teenage brothers Charles de Young and M. H. de Young, Michael H. de ...
'' that "this is a really entertaining true tale" that transparently depicts the operations of a typical cruise ship but found that the book would not appeal to all people. He said the book has "a fair amount of vividly described debauchery and rough language" and that "you stop feeling sorry for the guy—who signed on to follow his girlfriend—after the 500th time he describes some impossibly beautiful Eastern European nymph and wonders what his chances are at scoring with her". ''
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''s David Pitt, who called the book "very funny, behind-the-scenes", penned a positive review. He wrote, "Imagine a combination of ''
Innocents Abroad ''The Innocents Abroad, or The New Pilgrims' Progress'' is a travel book by American author Mark Twain. Published in 1869, it humorously chronicles what Twain called his "Great Pleasure Excursion" on board the chartered vessel ''Quaker City'' ...
'' and ''
The Love Boat ''The Love Boat'' is an American romantic comedy/drama television series that aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986; in addition, four three-hour specials aired in 1986, 1987, and 1990. The series was set on the luxury passenger cruise ship MS ''Pac ...
'', with a dash of '' Peyton Place'', and you'll have a good idea of what to expect: lots of humorous fumbling about as men and women of various nationalities mold themselves into an efficient team without stepping on each others' cultural toes; the glitz and polished shine of a seagoing luxury hotel (contrasted with the sometimes-disgusting living conditions of the crew); and plenty of shenanigans, including raucous parties and, of course, sexual escapades."


Sequels

The ''Cruise Confidential'' series is composed of four books: *''Cruise Confidential'' (2008, Traveler's Tales ) *''Ship for Brains'' (2011, World Waters ) *''Unsinkable Mister Brown'' (2012, World Waters ) *''High Seas Drifter ''(2014, World Waters ) Matt Krueger wrote in '' The Daily News'' that ''Ship for Brains'' compared to ''Cruise Confidential'' "isn't as sharply written, but has a much better title". The book discusses what it is like to be a cruise ship
art auction Art is a diverse range of human activity, and resulting product, that involves creative or imaginative talent expressive of technical proficiency, beauty, emotional power, or conceptual ideas. There is no generally agreed definition of wh ...
eer.
Midwest Book Review Midwest Book Review, established in 1976, produces nine book-review publications per month. Organization Midwest Book Review was established in 1976. The editor-in-chief of the organization is James A. Cox. The review puts out nine publications on ...
's John Burroughs praised the book, writing, "With a grand dose of humor and a good dose of memoir, ''Ship for Brains'' is a fine pick, not to be overlooked." The third book in the series, ''Unsinkable Mister Brown'', is a memoir about Bruns' time as an auctioneer on cruise ships and is filled with his funny experiences. Able Greenspan penned a positive review of the book for the Midwest Book Review, stating, "The people you see on these cruises and the attraction of high class luxury makes ''Unsinkable Mister Brown'' a read that shouldn't be missed for those who love good stories about life and what passes for it." In ''Foreword Reviews'', Jessica Henkle stated "With a candid, no-muss style, Bruns shows just how smitten he and Bianca are with one another" and "Humorous and heartfelt, this book explores the depths one man will dive to for the woman he loves."


Brian David Bruns

Brian David Bruns, the book's author, attended John F. Kennedy High School in
Cedar Rapids Cedar Rapids () is the second-largest city in Iowa, United States and is the county seat of Linn County. The city lies on both banks of the Cedar River, north of Iowa City and northeast of Des Moines, the state's capital and largest city. ...
. Having dreamed of becoming a writer since he was 15 years old, as an adolescent he submitted a book in the
fantasy Fantasy is a genre of speculative fiction involving Magic (supernatural), magical elements, typically set in a fictional universe and sometimes inspired by mythology and folklore. Its roots are in oral traditions, which then became fantasy ...
and sorcerer genres to a writing competition for teenagers though did not win. Bruns attended the
University of Northern Iowa The University of Northern Iowa (UNI) is a public university in Cedar Falls, Iowa. UNI offers more than 90 majors across the colleges of Business Administration, Education, Humanities, Arts, and Sciences, Social and Behavioral Sciences and grad ...
, where he graduated with an
art history Art history is the study of aesthetic objects and visual expression in historical and stylistic context. Traditionally, the discipline of art history emphasized painting, drawing, sculpture, architecture, ceramics and decorative arts; yet today ...
degree. Prior to his travels, he had lived for 25 years in Iowa. Bruns started a
Reno, Nevada Reno ( ) is a city in the northwest section of the U.S. state of Nevada, along the Nevada-California border, about north from Lake Tahoe, known as "The Biggest Little City in the World". Known for its casino and tourism industry, Reno is the ...
-based
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s software company which had to shut down owing to the weak economy. Bruns met Bianca, a Romanian woman who was a cruise ship employee, through a former employee who connected them. He began working on cruise ships to be with her, starting his cruise ship career with
Carnival Cruise Lines Carnival Cruise Line is an international cruise line with headquarters in Doral, Florida. The company is a subsidiary of Carnival Corporation & plc. Its logo is a funnel shaped like a whale's tail, with a red, white, and blue color scheme. This ...
when he was 30 years old. Bruns spent four years working on cruise ships with about one year as a waiter and three years as an
art auction Art is a diverse range of human activity, and resulting product, that involves creative or imaginative talent expressive of technical proficiency, beauty, emotional power, or conceptual ideas. There is no generally agreed definition of wh ...
eer. He lived in Romania while on break from his cruise ship contracts. Bruns' relationship with Bianca lasted four years as she wanted to stay in Romania and he had no interest in moving there permanently. Fluent in Romanian, Bruns met another Romanian woman, Aurelia, who was employed in a cruise ship casino. After they worked together on ships for a year, Bruns and Aurelia got married on
Valentine's Day Valentine's Day, also called Saint Valentine's Day or the Feast of Saint Valentine, is celebrated annually on February 14. It originated as a Christian feast day honoring one or two early Christian martyrs named Saint Valentine and, throu ...
in 2007 in Reno. Around 2009, the couple moved to Las Vegas and in 2015 they lived in
Summerlin, Nevada Summerlin is a master-planned community in the Las Vegas Valley of Southern Nevada. It lies at the edge of the Spring Mountains and Red Rock Canyon to the west; it is partly within the official city limits of Las Vegas and partly within uninco ...
in the
Las Vegas Valley The Las Vegas Valley is a major metropolitan area in the Southern Nevada, southern part of the U.S. state of Nevada, and the second largest in the Southwestern United States. The state's largest urban agglomeration, the Las Vegas Metropolitan Stat ...
. In 2015, Bruns published a horror book titled ''In the House of Leviathan''.


Awards

*Book of the Year, Benjamin Franklin Awards (2009) *Book of the Year, ForeWord Awards (2009) *New England Book Festival, finalist (2008)


References

{{Reflist


External links


Interview of Brian David Bruns
in January 2012 on the
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program ''
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''
Reuters photo
of Brian David Bruns and his wife Aurelia Bruns posing for a selfie on August 17, 2020, at Furnace Creek Visitors Center in
Death Valley, California Death Valley is a desert valley in Eastern California, in the northern Mojave Desert, bordering the Great Basin Desert. During summer, it is the hottest place on Earth. Death Valley's Badwater Basin is the point of lowest elevation in North A ...
2008 non-fiction books American travel books Carnival Cruise Lines Comedy books Travelogues