Adult Bar And Bat Mitzvah
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An adult bar/bat mitzvah is a bar or bat mitzvah of a person older than the customary age. Traditionally, a bar or bat mitzvah occurs at age 13 for boys and 12 for girls. Many adult Jews who have never had a bar or bat mitzvah, however, may choose to have one later in life, and many who have had one at the traditional age choose to have a second. An adult bar or bat mitzvah can be held at any age after adulthood is reached and can be performed in a variety of ways. The adult and child bar/bat mitzvot differ in that the former is planned by the person becoming b' mitzvah and the latter by the child's community, caregiver, and/or parent. Due to it taking place at an advanced stage of life, many relatives who were present at a child's bar/bat mitzvah are often deceased, and the person is often married and/or has children and sometimes grandchildren. Many men have second bar mitzvot at age 83; representing 70 years since their first.


Reasons

There are many reasons adult Jews choose to have a bar or bat mitzvah: * Many adult women do not have a bat mitzvah as children due to lack of popularity and/or restrictive gender norms. * Individuals with learning disabilities that made the process of preparing for their bar or bat mitzvah too difficult during childhood. * Adults who have converted to Judaism may want a bar or bat mitzvah. * Many non-religious Jews who had little or no Jewish education as children. * Those who have had a bar or bat mitzvah as children decide to undergo renewal. *Transgender Jews who had a bar or bat mitzvah as their gender assigned at birth may wish to have the other one as an adult using their new gender and name. * Many Holocaust survivors didn't have the opportunity to become a bar or bat mitzvah.


History

Rabbi Albert Axelrad of
Brandeis University , mottoeng = "Truth even unto its innermost parts" , established = , type = Private research university , accreditation = NECHE , president = Ronald D. Liebowitz , pro ...
officiated the first adult bar and bat mitzvahs in the early 1970s. He encouraged the practice in all denominations of Judaism. Between 1995 and 2001, Hadassah held group adult Bat Mitzvah ceremonies for 180 women. In 2001, the
Union for Reform Judaism The Union for Reform Judaism (URJ), known as the Union of American Hebrew Congregations (UAHC) until 2003, founded in 1873 by Rabbi Isaac Mayer Wise, is the congregational arm of Reform Judaism in North America. The other two arms established ...
created a guide on adult bar and bat mitzvah programs which was adopted by 900 congregations. In 2002, the Conservative Movement adopted this guide as well.


Process

The process of becoming a bar or bat mitzvah for adults involves studying for a year or longer. It consists of Hebrew language, Jewish rituals, Torah readings, and Haftorah readings. Many synagogues provide classes for adults.


Notable adult bar and bat mitzvahs

*
Paula Abdul Paula Julie Abdul (born June 19, 1962) is an American singer, dancer, choreographer, actress, and television personality. She began her career as a cheerleader for the Los Angeles Lakers at the age of 18 and later became the head choreograph ...
had an adult bat mitzvah in
Safed Safed (known in Hebrew language, Hebrew as Tzfat; Sephardi Hebrew, Sephardic Hebrew & Modern Hebrew: צְפַת ''Tsfat'', Ashkenazi Hebrew pronunciation, Ashkenazi Hebrew: ''Tzfas'', Biblical Hebrew: ''Ṣǝp̄aṯ''; ar, صفد, ''Ṣafad''), i ...
on November 2, 2013, aged 51. She had originally planned to hold it at the
Western Wall The Western Wall ( he, הַכּוֹתֶל הַמַּעֲרָבִי, HaKotel HaMa'aravi, the western wall, often shortened to the Kotel or Kosel), known in the West as the Wailing Wall, and in Islam as the Buraq Wall (Arabic: حَائِط ...
in
Jerusalem Jerusalem (; he, יְרוּשָׁלַיִם ; ar, القُدس ) (combining the Biblical and common usage Arabic names); grc, Ἱερουσαλήμ/Ἰεροσόλυμα, Hierousalḗm/Hierosóluma; hy, Երուսաղեմ, Erusałēm. i ...
but changed her plans due to
jet lag Jet lag is a physiological condition that results from alterations to the body's circadian rhythms caused by rapid long-distance trans-meridian (east–west or west–east) travel. For example, someone flying from New York to London, i.e. fr ...
and the media circus that would follow. *
Armand Hammer Armand Hammer (May 21, 1898 – December 10, 1990) was an American business manager and owner, most closely associated with Occidental Petroleum, a company he ran from 1957 until his death. Called "Lenin's chosen capitalist" by the press, ...
died on December 11, 1990, on the evening before his planned bar mitzvah aged 92. * In June 2012, actor
David Arquette David Arquette (born September 8, 1971) is an American actor and former professional wrestler. He is best known for his role as Dewey Riley in the slasher film franchise ''Scream'', for which he won a Teen Choice Award and two Blockbuster Enter ...
celebrated his bar mitzvah aged 40 at the Kotel. * In October 2015, actor
James Franco James Edward Franco (born April 19, 1978) is an American actor and filmmaker. For his role in '' 127 Hours'' (2010), he was nominated for an Academy Award for Best Actor. Franco is known for his roles in films, such as Sam Raimi's ''Spider-Ma ...
celebrated his bar mitzvah aged 37. *
Yisrael Kristal Yisrael Kristal (or Israel Kristal; born Izrael Icek Kryształ; he, ישראל קרישטל; 15 September 1903 – 11 August 2017) was a Polish-Israeli supercentenarian recognized in 2014 as the oldest living Holocaust survivor. After the dea ...
held his bar mitzvah at the age of 113. He was the world's oldest living man at the time. * In December 2019, comedian
Tiffany Haddish Tiffany Sara Cornilia Haddish (born December 3, 1979) is an American stand-up comedian and actress. After guest-starring on several television series and lead role on a cable drama, Haddish gained prominence for her role as Nekeisha Williams on ...
celebrated her bat mitzvah aged 40. In popular culture, there have been depictions of adult bar mitzvahs on TV shows: * An episode during the last season of ''
The Dick Van Dyke Show ''The Dick Van Dyke Show'' is an American television sitcom created by Carl Reiner that initially aired on CBS from October 3, 1961 to June 1, 1966, with a total of 158 half-hour episodes spanning five seasons. It was produced by Calvada Product ...
'' depicts Buddy having his bar mitzvah, having been too poor to have one as a boy. * The ''
Simpsons ''The Simpsons'' is an American animated sitcom created by Matt Groening for the Fox Broadcasting Company. The series is a satirical depiction of American life, epitomized by the Simpson family, which consists of Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa, a ...
'' episode "
Today I Am a Clown "Today I Am a Clown" is the sixth episode of the The Simpsons (season 15), fifteenth season of the American animated television series ''The Simpsons''. It originally aired on the Fox Broadcasting Company, Fox network in the United States on Dece ...
" depicts
Krusty the Klown Herschel Shmoikel Pinchas Yerucham Krustofsky (; ) better known by his stage name Krusty the Clown (sometimes spelled as Krusty the Klown), is a recurring character on the animated television series ''The Simpsons''. He is voiced by Dan Castel ...
having a bar mitzvah. * On an episode of
Touched by an Angel ''Touched by an Angel'' is an American fantasy drama television series that premiered on CBS on September 21, 1994, and ran for 211 episodes over nine seasons until its conclusion on April 27, 2003. Created by John Masius and executive produced ...
,
Kirk Douglas Kirk Douglas (born Issur Danielovitch; December 9, 1916 – February 5, 2020) was an American actor and filmmaker. After an impoverished childhood, he made his film debut in ''The Strange Love of Martha Ivers'' (1946) with Barbara Stanwyck. Do ...
played a man who (like Douglas himself) has a second bar mitzvah at the age of 83.


References


External links


My Jewish Learning - The Adult Bar/Bat Mitzvah
{{Jewish life Jewish law and rituals Judaism and women Bar and bat mitzvah